I have been with my husband for around 8 years. When I met him I was a single mom. I was pretty comfortable not having a serious relationship but he seemed like a dream come true. Fast forward and not one thing he said about himself has been true and not one thing he said he was going to do has happened. We had an unexpected baby last year (told I had unexplained infertility) and I’m now a sahm due to lack of childcare in our rural area and I no longer have a car. When I was first pregnant I had the typical cheating dreams and I tried talking to him about them for some reassurance while I was in Disney world with my two youngest. He screamed at me, refused to speak to me, and accused me of sleeping with dads in Disney world and said the baby wasn’t his. He talks to me in a voice that sounds like he’s handicapped on a daily basis when he mocks me. Gets mad if I ask him about anything. Tells me I do nothing but take care of the house and he works. I can’t bring up any tasks around the house that need done, like the bag of metal trash in our basement that’s been there for 6 years. I’m not perfect and can be passive aggressive at times but I try to be as respectful as possible. Here’s my big issue right now. Whenever I try to bring up anything like talking to me in the handicapped voice, not cussing or name calling, interrupting conversations etc his first response is ALWAYS you do it too and laughs and calls me a hypocrite. I feel so upset bc I consciously choose my words to try to avoid a negative conversation. I then feel crazy because I literally have no idea I’ve done all these things. I’ve also noticed if I bring something up like I said one time I felt like he was gaslighting me, he then turned around in the next argument and told me I was gaslighting him when he told me I said things I really believe I didn’t say. He’s so exaggerated in conversations it’s so hard to communicate. Am I crazy? I feel like I’m walking on egg shells all the time but he says it’s me. How do I know?!?
3 comments
Look up ” Husband is gaslighting me”, on YouTube. You’re not crazy, you’re in pain.
He’s not only a childish gaslighting jerk, but he sounds like a narc. This isn’t what you signed up or envisioned in regards to marriage.
Ma’am what made you talk about infidelity while at the “happiest” place on earth? I’m not trying to downplay your situation but did you really spend 500 bucks just to get into a fight where nothing could possibly be solved? With your kids around no less. I want to be supportive but you need to address these things within an appropriate setting such as therapy or counseling. Please also never let your child know they were unexpected it’ll just cost you more therapy.