I’m in my third year of high school and I have no idea how to talk to people in groups or that are my age in general. I believe it started in first year when I was very insecure about myself and even though I felt kind of alone or lost everybody around me looked like they had known each other for years and were just catching up. I tried to insert myself any way I could into a group I felt I could benefit but would also benefit me as well. There was many attempts that year with many different groups and I noticed a pattern of what would happen. Every time I would get along good with them time would pass and I would kind of be distanced from them as a whole and from that I would be left with a couple people from that group which I connected well with. Then where it all fell apart completely was COVID, for about 2 years I had no contact with almost anybody from school other than those which I happened to get on snap. This was killer and throughout quarantine I was mostly alone or I would hang out with 1-3 people at a time and my actual friends consisted of 5 people max. Fast forward to now, I feel so much better about myself, I haven’t drastically improved but my mind set is a lot better about myself. The problem I have now is that I lack motivation to do anything because, frankly, the people around me are sounding a lot more uninteresting. This is killer in my situation because I could definitely be doing more but due to the lack of interest I have to talk to these people I don’t. I don’t know, it just seems like everyone my age is so plain, they talk about such mainstream and whatever is popular (this is not to say I am edgy or “different” I just don’t find interest in that). I feel like having a conversation with these people is just impossible, it just sounds like loud noises and then obnoxious laughter afterwards. This is where I am mainly conflicted because I want to develop better social skills and make friends but not really with the groups at my school, I just simply have no interest. Currently I have about 5 or 6 good friends but again they are all from different friend groups. This makes it hard to do a group thing and make time for all them on top of school and work. I am constantly trying to justify that I am fine where I am but that won’t do me any good so I would like to hear whatever the people of Reddit have to say.
3 comments
I remember that feeling of kids talking sounding like loud noises followed by loud laughter. When I listen to a lot of teenagers talk still in their groups it still sounds the same. It’s like I can’t really make out what they are saying and the laughing afterwards almost seems fake. I dunno it was annoying to be around everyday in school and be expected to actually try to find a way to interact with such a mess. I had kinda forgot until I read this because I just don’t have to hear teenage kids in their groups much anymore. 🤷♂️🤷♂️🤷♂️
Dude, I (16f) am in a similar situation. In my freshman year everyone knew each other already and the only people who would accept me were toxic people who didn’t have a any social skills themselves. And I get it, you’re not being “edgy” at all…a lot of teens just act stupid and sometimes you just can’t relate to that. I only have one solid friend, and while I wish I had a more solid friend group, I am okay with being more alone if that means I’m avoiding toxic people or people who aren’t at the same level as me. I heard in college when you’re surrounded by people who have the same interests at you, it gets better. But I would also say to try to join clubs at your school that interest you. People are sorta forced to talk to you there.
Did this post just proved that changing schools (and ofc people around me) won’t solve anything?
As someone who’s freshman year starts in September, i’m deeply concerned that as a socially awkward person i’m doomed forever