PLEASE HELP: I hooked up with a friend, don’t know where to go from this now

We’re both 19 and in college. He’s one of my three best friends here, and he means a lot to me. We went to a party last night and had a lot to drink. I don’t remember how he got in my room last night or when we started kissing but we were making out pretty heavily. We did get semi far into the hook up, both at least half naked. There’s even an unused but open condom on my nightstand. We paused in between when I was expressing my hesitation. He did absolutely nothing wrong, I was just not sure if this was the right move.

He told me that he’s been wanting to do this for a while and that it would be worth it (seemed to mean it in a get it out of our system way). Now, I’m going to give a little backstory on our friendship. We’ve always been kind of flirty. And we spend several nights a week cuddling, there’s been a few times where I thought he might kiss me (I’ve always pulled away a bit out of fear). There’s another girl in our group who he flirts with a lot and I theorized (along with the rest of the group, but she denies it) has a bit of a thing for him. I told him I didn’t want to get in the middle of that. He said that he’s not into her at all, only me. He’s also had friends with benefits situations with 2 other girls who we were semi close with before. But those were both months ago.

Back to last night, I explained to him that I’m not sure if I’m in a place where I can have no strings attached sex with a friend. I assume his intentions were no strings attached, I never asked him, I was the one who put that out there. The truth is that I have feelings for him and am afraid of getting hurt by this. But I did not tell him this.

My other concern was our friends. We’re in the same friend group and I’m afraid of ruining the group. I don’t want to upset anyone by being selfish with this hookup.

I also told him that I have quite the history with semi ghosting people after hookups and was afraid that I might be too scared to talk to him after we hook up.

After a while of this weird on and off make up sesh, he said that based on my hesitation it was probably best that we don’t hookup because he didn’t want to upset me. That was alright with me and felt respectful.

I was upfront with my fears about this the whole time. I never told him I would hook up with him, just that I was considering it. I understand that may have given him confusion, but I don’t feel like I did anything wrong because I was super straight up with him the whole time (Aside from the fact that I have feelings for him). Even as things progressed, I was warning him.

Now today, he’s left stuff in my room from last night and I haven’t heard from him (I haven’t reached out either). He needs to pick these things up. We hang out most days (he lives right across the hall from me), but not all. So, it isn’t exactly bizarre to have not heard anything. But considering that he left stuff in my room, I find it a little odd that he hasn’t at least just come to pick it up. Should I knock on his door or text him and let him know that they’re here or let him come to me?

I understand that I was the confusing one here and that I was the hesitant one last night. So, selfishly I wish I had heard from him today. What do you guys think I should do now? Do you think that I wronged him at all?

**TL;DR;** : I began hooking up with a close friend while drunk last night (we did not get to the point of having sex), but I had a lot of hesitation. Mainly because I have feelings for him and was afraid that I wouldn’t be able to handle FWB (assuming those were his intentions). Now, I haven’t heard anything and I’m not sure what to do.