How has your physical appearance affected the way people treated you throughout your life?

43 comments

  1. Sometimes I’ve been fat, sometimes I’ve been fit. When I’m fat, nobody gives a fuck what I have to say and they don’t really want to hang out with me as much. When I’m fit, people love hearing what I have to say and social opportunities find me.

    Interestingly, I do great with women when I’m fat. I do even better when I’m fit. It’s those middle parts where I struggle. I think when I’m fat women see a man who is in control of his life and just likes to live big and eat big and doesn’t care about fitness. When I’m fit, they like my fitness and a see a guy who can take care of himself. When I’m in the middle, they see a guy who would like to be fit but isn’t.

  2. I think that it’s the single greatest influence on how you’re treated in your day to day life and the only people who will tell you otherwise are the ones who have never experienced pretty privilege. Good looks = life on easy mode

  3. Yes. I am extremely good looking and it’s very obvious how I get treated much better when I am out with friends who are not as good looking as me

  4. I look young for my age and people dont treat me seriously most of the time. It has pros and cons.

  5. I’ve been told I’m very attractive my entire life, and guys always assume I get with a lot of girls.

    I don’t, I’m extremely shy around women. I’ve had plenty of girlfriends and flings but I am not the kind of guy that like, meets some hot chick at the gym and takes her home.

  8. I’m rather unremarkable looking, so mostly I’ve just been ignored/unnoticed. It probably played a part in why my sense of humor is a little outrageous/offensive; it’s a subconscious coping mechanism to get attention from others.

  9. I was a pretty boy as a young men and women were so nice to me. I went bald and women were no longer so nice to me.

  12. I feel i get put on a pedestal for no reason for other than looking a certain way that people think is attractive and im tall and slender. Then when you get to know me and find im just a regular jane shmo the rose tinted lenses fade and i fall off that pedestal pretty quick.

  13. I was gross looking until I started working out and getting shredded in high school. Night and fucking day difference in just 6 months. I remember being shocked when I came back after summer break and all of a sudden people wanted to be my friend, random girls hitting me up, getting invited to shit etc even though my personality was still dorky. I vowed to never let myself get out of shape or go over 15% body fat ever again.

    Side note it’s insane how much working out changes your face. No more chubby cheeks and double chin was a life changer.

  14. The look people give when the see me is the same look you get when you step barefoot in cold dog shit so take a guess

  15. Asian men tend to not be a first choice (appearance) for primarily white women.

    That being said, not too bad today if you meet the kpop aesthetic, and generally I still have some pull I suppose, my girlfriends have alwayse been non asian and frankly it’s not that big a deal anymore in my generation.

    Travelling, I look just half enough to be half what ever. People are generally unsure about my background and i can look local enough. And people have approached me in their native tongue hoping I could help (I’m usually really Good at figuring out the language and using translate and speak multiple languages as well)

    I was randomly called a gook, and have been chin chonged before.

    I was that stereotypical asian growing up. Honour student, went into accounting, spoke multiple languages, played multiple instruments. Etc.

  16. Depends.

    When i’m fit i get extreme reactions from women…. in that the ones who find me attractive get down right pervy as i tend to “fill out” my shirts and trousers in the office and the ones who get annoyed that I’ve dropped so much weight in the spring get super bitchy because they don’t understand I drop the weight by training and not because I’ve limited myself to half a fresh-air sandwich per day.

    With other men… it’s mostly respect either genuine or grudging

  17. Yes, there is such a thing as the pretty person bubble. I’ve benefitted greatly from it. One example, I’ve only had one actual traffic ticket in my entire life, despite being pulled over numerous times, and despite driving regularly since age 13 without a license, and being caught. Another example, sitting at a table of men, the food bar was out of the M&m cookies. I really wanted another one. I casually mentioned I wish there were more M&m cookies. Suddenly, I had three M&m cookies handed to me. I was about 40 when that happened.

    Although, I’m aging now and I’ve noticed my looks are getting me less privilege than when I was younger. I started noticing a difference when I was about 50. I think now if I mentioned I wanted an M&m cookie at a table full of men, I’d be SOL. But it was fun while it lasted.

  18. When I was 350lb people treated me like shit on the bottom of their shoe.

    When I got down to 180 people treated me like a human.

  19. never once been hit on. Always a friend, never anything more.

    Asked a girl to the prom and she said no, but she got dressed up anyway and went out with her friends after.

  21. Badly. Never recovered from getting bad acne at the start of high school. What an absolute nightmare of a life.

  22. I’ve had a lot of social anxiety, very shy and withdrawn growing up, and when you’re a bigger guy with a shaved head and resting bastard face, I think it comes across as more threatening than shy.

    Once in high school and once in college I was told I seemed like the kind of person who was going to come in with a gun someday and start blasting.

  23. When I look good and I know I look good my confident is way higher, and people respond more positively to me because they notice my presence before I even talk to them. I notice people looking at me more and smiling at me.

    Interestingly the difference between being really low body fat (e.g. full six pack) compared to slightly more body fat (e.g. faint outline of abs) makes a huge difference for my facial attractiveness and the way people treat me

  24. Shit, it’s a huge factor.

    I was a small kid growing up, like among the 2-3 smallest kids in middle school of several hundred. I was athletic, but not big enough to do a lot of sports at the level others that simply where bigger could do. I was also smart, got good grades and quiet-ish. So naturally, I was teased a lot. I was the butt of jokes among the girls (couldn’t tell you how many times I’d here “ew, I bet you have crush on XXXXX”, I was the name to throw out there to ridicule another girl over, that was great!). The guys didn’t really care as much actually, maybe because when teasing got to be too much I’d fight back and I was a scrappy fucker. But the girls we brutal. This continued to be the case into sophomore year of high school until I finally hit my growth spurt.

    So come junior year, I’m actually a bit above average height and starting to get ripped, at least for a 16 year old, so of course now many of the girls that previously teased me or used me as the butt of jokes, they start showing interest. Only I was fucking done with them, every last one of them. Then college happened and it was fucking great, being tall enough (5’11”) and hitting the weight room like you mean it works.

  26. I’m a pretty average white guy. So in day to day life there doesn’t seem to be much of an effect. I get about as much attention on dating apps as if I were a troll though. And living in utah my appearance makes everyone assume I’m a mormon, especially combined with being somewhat of a quiet guy. So I’ve definitely missed a few social opportunities because people assume I wouldn’t be interested because there would be beer there. So that’s a little annoying. Gotta look clean cut and professional for a lot of careers though.

  27. I’m tall, muscular, and good looking. People treat me so much better than my friends with lesser looks.

  28. Im alone and been made to feel worthless because of it. Im suicidal because of it. Every night my bed is empty because of it

  29. Growing up I was always tall and skinny. Easy target to pick on, not particularly good looking. Led to a lot of “harassment”, but I learned to take it in stride and even give it back.

    I joined the military and got healthier and larger. Ended up being fairly successful with the ladies for a while.

    Now I’m still in decent shape, more filled out than I used to be. Found more confidence in my appearance, which leads to much more positive interactions with people. But I find my recently larger frame can be a little intimidating at times, especially considering I’m kind of abrasive and perhaps a little loud at times.

  30. My appearance is very up and down, but I notice people tend to trust me more when I’m in better shape. But that’s not a huge improvement because they show some ugly fucking stripes.

  31. I find that people (men especially) talk to me first and they’re definitely more friendly and willing to do things for me

  32. I don’t know if being young also influenced the way people treated me back then, but when i was in middle school, i was always the shortest in the room and that sucked, people didn’t take me seriously and girls didn’t find me attractive at all, at the end of hs i had sudden growth (like idk almost a foot) and seriously… It’s like night and day, it was definetely a glow up and it was just the height that changed, my personality and looks were the same lol, the thing that opened my eyes was the huge difference of treatment by girls, i just don’t understand why they start treating me better because i’m now taller, wtf?

  34. Ignored I guess? I’m 4/10, so there’s nothing to attract people to me or give anyone reason to mock me.

  35. Well, if I need a hair cut, a shave, didn’t sleep well, and am in my work clothes I look shitty snd borderline homeless. (Most of the time)

    If im all cleaned up and dressed well I’m slightly above average looking. (Taking the time before going out)

    I dunno people treat me about the same because I’m polite and friendly. I get more attention from women when I’m cleaned up though verses when I look like a bum.

  37. I’m often called an ogre because I’m big, tall, and ugly. People will either treat me like a workhorse or a potential threat.

  38. Huge. I was a late bloomer, but also, puberty hit me like a damn truck. I never thought people could be so nice until I fit society’s “attractive” standard in my early 20s. I was one of the Straight-A nerds in school and guys were not into me at all, they were never interested in being more than just friends. A lot of them branded me and other girls who were into anime and manga (not to the point of weebs) as freak. I only had 5 friends throughout HS. Restaurant/store staffs were indifferent back then, not unfriendly, just indifferent.

    Now when I tell people I like anime and manga, they call me quirky and cute. Staffs are also more chatty, joke more with me, and give a lot more freebies. Strangers are more willing to help too when I’m in public. So many instances, but you get the gist of it. The downside of it all is that I get more unsolicited dick pics on every single social media account.

  39. Like a lot of guys here I was invisible at my biggest, ironic lmao was 300 up until 2019. Today I’m 190 with fat still but also got some muscle, feel like an idol or something

  40. People were always put at ease by my smile (apparently I smile with my whole face and have dimples). When I was young and scrawny, being 6’4 meant I’m just a stick figure and being gay made me a target of bullying and physical assault. As a I grew older and put on about 20kg of muscle, people are either comfortable around me or slightly intimidated (the latter usually happens when I’m sitting down across from them and then suddenly get up). As I’m graying, I’m noticing more women flirt with me.

  41. I was an ugly fat kid and had a glowup in my later teens. Wow, did women treat men differently. There was a small difference with men but the difference from women was night and day. Not just women I might date either. Women teachers, relatives, old women treated me completely differently too.

    It really is much better to be attractive.

  42. I’m short and have a baby face. People treat me like a child, even when wearing my government issued uniform, some also don’t believe what I say and ask my colleague the same question and believe them when they tell them the same answer. My colleagues have my back and tell them I’m qualified to do my work. And that is just professional related. In personal live I never had anyone interested in me.

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