I am ultimately happy with my career choice but it does require massive amount of time and study. Almost completely finished with training and I currently have time off for a couple of months…so I’m enjoying it (its rare). I’ve just been reflecting and wanted to hear some other men’s thoughts.

8 comments

  1. I busted my tail through my 20’s (undergrad, 50-60+ hours a week, then earned my MBA at night) and was able to move up very fast in a large company. I could tell it was taking its toll on me, so when we decided to have kids, I took a higher level (VP) position at a smaller company, that I was probably overqualified for. I lost some pay and benefits, but gained a ton of freedom, and don’t have to put up with the corporate BS that drove me nuts. Overall, I am happier now, but I wouldn’t be here if I didn’t do everything prior to it.

  2. Not being single, having too many friends. Ultimately, I failed to be selfish for the right reasons and look after myself

  3. College professor here. I’m in English, where there is fierce competition for tenure-track jobs. There are two things I didn’t consider as carefully as I should have:

    **1) Getting a PhD really screws with future planning.** You lose your 20s to some intense, cloistered work where you don’t make much money, and that has ripple effects for e.g. retirement savings, starting a family, and so on. The downstream costs for retirement are especially severe.

    **2) “Good job, good company, good location: choose two”** is the rule for a lot of competitive careers. That’s fine when you’re single, but now that I’m married with kids the costs of that are pretty wild.

    Location in particular limits the quality of school systems you have access to — outside a select few higher-end suburbs and major metro areas, most public schools in the US are kinda trash, and you aren’t going to find good private schools (i.e. good enough to attract students from around the world, and not just from the region).

    And if you’re a dual-income household, location pinning really restricts your options. My wife could make about twice as much at a larger hospital system, but since we’ve decided to stay where we are (for a lot of reasons, and not just my career) we’ve just got to eat that.

  4. I used to work like 60+hrs/week , friends don’t reach out anymore , no time to date , no time to do anything you love , you just relax and enjoy that while you can , i am happy though it’s better than doing nothing , may i ask what kind of job do you do

  5. Regret: Not pursuing a more highly competitive career than the one I pursued. It’s easy to set your sights too low because you model your strategy after the people around you.

  6. Medical field….. lost my 20s kinda. I’m doing okay now but sometimes when I chat with people about their 20s adventures…… I get sad.

  7. I’m currently trying to pursue one. It isn’t necessarily my passion or favorite subject in the world, but I hope to do good work in it and use the funds to maintain my actual interests.

    Sacrifice-wise, I know I’ll be dedicating a lot of time and effort into it now and later. It has cost me a bit of sanity and personal happiness right now. Since I’m on the older end (late 20s), I have also effectively given up ever getting married as well due to my age and my general attitude, which is less-than-cordial overall.

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