I’m a 22M who is going to graduate in several months. I currently don’t have many friends. I have been in college for almost five years and up to this point, I’m having a lot of trouble making friends and finding people who genuinely want to get to know and interact with me for long-term. As of right now, I currently know around 7 people who I consistently talk to but they’re mostly acquaintances from classes rather than friends. Most friends I have now which is not many, are friends I maintained from high school. I’m working on making new connections during the time I have left here but I am not very confident about it. I used to have more genuine friends at school but they randomly drifted away.
I have been thinking a lot about what my life will look like after college, and it’s been frightening. Growing up, I have always been the shy and quiet guy and never had a lot of genuine friends. I’m not in touch or connected with a lot of people from my hometown that I will go back to after college. I have heard a lot about how much harder it is to make new friends and connections after college. In college, it’s considered much easier for a lot of people, because you often have people around you and there are a ton of opportunities. I don’t think it’s the same case after when you go into the real world and focus on a career. Most friends or acquaintances you meet in college will inevitably drift away too just like high school.
I just want to hear experiences from people who have already graduated. How hard is it for you to meet and make new friends after school?
2 comments
It was.rough for me. It was a long time back. I’m 47. I moved to a new place for work. I didn’t know anyone. I also have social anxiety, so that didn’t help, either. Everyone in my workplace was older/coupled up/or didn’t like me. It’s pretty safe to say that it was a rough transition.
I finally made friends with a gay guy at my work.
I transferred universities after freshmen year and made an effort to stay in touch with friends via Facebook. Then I started dating someone at my new school who didn’t like my friends so I stopped talking to them (I thought I was being respectful to my partner). After I finished school and our relationship ended, I had a few friends left but they stopped talking to me after they got married and had kids.
I’m 34 now and I WFH. I don’t see any friends in person and just have a few I talk to on Instagram. It’s really hard. I’m moving to a new state in a couple months and hoping that helps me meet new people. If you get an in-person job, it’s easier to make friends. Sometimes those friendships become real and sometimes they’re just your work pals.
Highly recommend looking for Meetup groups in your area. I can’t say I’ve made any lasting friendships but I also move almost every year. I’ve had some really fun experiences with those groups, which is better than nothing.