We started our relationship 5 years ago, after meeting each other while studying. We became friends without talking much and even clicked somehow. I know he loves me very much, that’s why we always made it work. We are communicating well with each other, also correct each other, talk everything out when having discussions, ask each other how our day went, talk about feelings and problems when someone is not feeling well, etc..

But next to serious topics, we don’t talk much. Silence is not bad, but he also feels awkward to make eye contact. Sometimes I talk about something to start up a conversation, but it seems like he is not interested. When i ask him why he doesn’t say anything, he often tells me he is not interested in the topic or has nothing to say about it. I can also not really talk about other topics, because he only likes his work/career for future purposes and fitness (and we have already talked much about these subjects!) There are many things I like, but he doesn’t keep the conversation going. Most of the time it’s me talking and it feels so lonely.

It isn’t that he is not interested anymore, because he never talked much. I know i can not change him and love him the way he is. Still it is not the first time I’m thinking about this problem. I am a social introvert with very less friends. The last year i had more contact with my friends than normally and now i feel like i enjoy spending my time more with my friends than with my boyfriend. Btw i don’t need to do any activity with my friends, just talking is enough for me to be happy. Please, I really would like some advice…

1 comment
  1. Honestly, part of being in a relationship is give and take. If he cannot do something as simple as listen when you speak, you cannot be happy with him. This is clearly important to you. Have you talked to him about this and how you feel? If so, how does he respond to that? If not, why are you posting here before having a conversation? I feel like there is some imperative information missing here that we need to know in order to be able to assist you.

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