He is 24M, I am 21F. We matched on “bumble dating” 2 weeks ago. 1st date was drinks at a ping pong bar. Clicked a lot. We had a second date 2 days later, drinks at a bar then chill at mine and he slept over (we kissed and he tried to take things further but i told him i didnt want to as im not ready yet and he respected that). 3rd date was the next day, drinks and dinner and he slept over again. 4th date was a day later: coffee, dinner, chilled at mine (we had sex). I then went on vacation for a week and we had our 5th date before yesterday: drinks, dinner then he slept at mine (he tried but we didnt do anything intimate except spoon, as im not so ready actually). 6th date was yesterday: we went to a techno rave together (we both are techno heads) and he later came back to mine where we just slept and had breakfast together later before he left.

Some little things: he makes my bed in the morning when we wake up, he kisses me on the cheek before he leaves, his mother was visiting and she bought him cigarette packs from home as they are cheaper there. He offered me a pack. (we both smoke). At the rave, he was pretty drunk: someone asked us if we were a couple and he silly-ly said “no… not yet”. He also later asked me (while drunk) “do you wanna get married?” “let’s get married”. Ps. He is a very silly and goofy guy so guess he was joking ofc.

I don’t understand why he continues to see me… and so often. As I am not giving him sex. We sleep in the same bed, but i dont allow intimacy (as im not ready). He does ask always tho “can we make love?” and I say no. and he continues to see me and to spend so much time with me. Idk im so used to guys wanting just sex. **Do you think this guy might want something more serious?**

3 comments
  1. Wow, okay, welcome to the world of guys who respect boundaries and see you as more than just a warm hole.

    He’s a nice guy. He respects you. He’s okay with waiting because he wants a sex partner who’s actually equally enthusiastic and ready for sex. There’s nothing wrong with him. He likes you. He sees you and values you. He’s letting you know he’s also attracted to you and would like sex—-but he’s totally cool with that being on your terms and only when you’re ready.

    There are a significant number of men like this. I’m sorry you’ve never encountered one before now.

  2. > As I am not giving him sex.

    Oh, geesh! He respects you. May see you as long term relationship material.

  3. Girl, this is a guy who isn’t pushing your boundaries. He is seeing you because he likes you.

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