The *only* reason I’m asking is because I found out later on and we already started talking.
I also want preface this by saying **I am not** one of those guys that can’t get anyone my age so I go for younger women. Both my exes were actually older than me (22F, 21F). And all the college girls I’ve hooked up w are second to fourth years.
I basically saw a Tiktok of her and found her cute. Clicked on the ig link and requested. She added back. Replied to her story, went from there.
We didn’t do anything sexual, but in convo she casually mentioned that she was a senior. This threw me off guard.
I obviously like her or else I wouldn’t be making this post. My first instinct wouldn’t be to go for a highschool senior but here we are.
Should I cut it off? Or is it not that weird?
**Edit:** Age of consent where I’m from is 16.
Edit 2:
So while it’s legal, a lot of people are saying it’s still weird bc I’m in the real world and she’s still a kid at home. Ofc I knew all this but I questioned it since she seemed like every other girl my age in the dms. Someone suggested that I meet her irl and check out the vibe since it’s hard to tell online. I haven’t talked to her that long and I’m seeing other people so I don’t think there’s much of a bias that’d be at play.
I still haven’t decided what I’m going to do. But she’s graduating in 2 months and starting college in 6. Maybe I’ll revisit “us” then. It’s not *that* big of a deal to me.
By the way, some of you fucking Americans need to get off your high horses. Just because your country states the law a certain way doesn’t make it an unquestionable, all-righteous, and universal truth. Like calm down, acting like I’m a predator…
27 comments
There not much age difference between you 2, if both have chemistry between both of you, go for it
🤨📸
She’s a child no matter how mature she seems or acts her brain is nowhere near being fully developed. Ngl op 22-17 is a big drop. Guessing she’s cool with the goofy immature side and your exs wanted you to grow up.
Could be weird but there’s a chance it won’t be. When you talk to her in person it will be obvious if there is a significant maturity level difference. School year is almost over for high school folks and chances are her birthday is around the corner anyways if she’s a senior, and a 2-3 year age gap isn’t uncommon.
It’s weird. Wait until she’s graduated at least.
Despite all the best intentions in the world, you could potentially face a lot of legal trouble if something goes even slightly wrong. Just stop talking to them, you’ll find someone else for sure.
Forget weird, you’re skirting with illegal.
Mate 3 years age difference is nothing. Don’t worry about it.
It’s weird
yeah it’s weird wait until shes 18 trust. if you’re asking here, you already know its weird deep down
Age of consent is 16 in a lot of countries, and anyone making out like there is a huge maturity gap between 17 and 20 probably hasn’t met too many 17 and 20 year olds, the reality is most 17 year olds are going to be sexually actively (I was and so was everybody I knew when I was that age) and 20 is still really young. I think unless you are breaking any laws where you are from then you are fine, enjoy being young and don’t worry about strangers on the internet, most of the people say it is weird are just overly sensitive keyboard warriors who get a kick out of being on their high horse, that’s for them not for you.
it’s gross. You’re now a grown man talking to a young teenager. In **highschool** at that
it’s weird. Move on.
How is the thread full of people saying it’s illegal? The OP hasn’t mentioned ONCE where he’s from? Are we still assuming every post on Reddit has been written by someone from the USA unless stated otherwise?
In the U.K. whilst this would be perfectly legal, 20 year olds dating people in high school never sits well with anybody. It wouldn’t matter that she’s 17 here, but it matters she’s still in school. I started university when I was 17. I guess it’s about life stages and you guys are JUST in the wrong age bracket. You’re not a monster but it might not be appropriate to start a thing with a high school student
Is it weird? No. I know parents with almost decades between them so no, it’s not weird.
But, you want to be careful. Depending on where you live, if you end up progressing the relationship while she’s still underage you may face some serious legal trouble, and since you’re the “adult” of the two of you, that hammer will hit you much harder.
Should you cut if off? That’s not for us to decide, that should be your own gambit. But I hope you are careful regardless of what you choose to do.
The age of consent is 16 where I’m from.
17 and 20 isn’t a big age gap. To me I wouldn’t really be concerned. If you’re that worried, break things off till she’s 18 if you really have to.
Proceed with caution and get to know her better to see what the maturity gap is.
I say go for it if you want OP but take it slow besides I know for a fact it ain’t illegal in the US to my knowledge because if I remember the story correctly my Grandmother and Grandfather got together when 17F and late 20sM but you would most likely have to keep it non sexual even in private until her 18th comes around but at the end of the day man if she seems to be the one shoot your shot but use caution
Okay, I’m not from US so correct me if I’m wrong. People in US go from toddler to adult overnight when they turn 18? Am I understanding it correctly?
No, I was 16 and he was 19 when I had my first bf. Women are more mature at that age so it’s not weird.
My best relationship started with me at 21 and her at 17 so totally ok
A 3 year gap is not weird by any means unless you talk to a weirdo who thinks ages means everything in a relationship for some reason. As long as you’re not a pedo and this relationship is legal then you’re fine. Be respectful, y’all are still young.
If you have to ask.. lol obviously you think it’s weird, she’s still a kid in highschool
I wouldn’t be concerned, OP. Age of consent is 16 here as well. When I was 17, I would have dated a 20 year old. When I was 20, I would have dated a 17 year old. A 3 year age gap is absolutely nothing even at your age – I’ve dated 10 years younger than me in my early 30’s and even that didn’t feel weird because we were both mature adults in similar stages of life. Go hang out with her, see what the vibe is and if you are both at a similar stage of maturity, I say go for it if it feels right.
If you have to ask…
I think you follow your plan, talk with her and meet up. Feel out the vibe and if there is something then pursue that! Is the college she wants to go to far away? How would that effect the relationship? I think that might be the most important factor.
i wouldnt judge u. both kids.