I’ve been wanting to make new friends where I live, but I don’t know how to feel about an encounter I had last week. My therapist wasn’t sure about it either. Some of my past relationships have been dangerous and unhealthy, so I’m feeling wary.

So I rode my bike to the beach several days ago. I watched the ocean for a bit and before I was about to bike back, a lady came up to me asking about my bike, where I got it, and how much it was. She was very chatty, but I didn’t feel uncomfortable. She said she was “done with men” and needed a friend, specifically some girlfriends in her life. She mentioned her “baby daddy,” so I assume she has a child, but she didn’t mention it. She’s 31 and didn’t seem to mind the age gap between us since I’m in my early 20s. I also don’t mind having older friends. She asked if I liked traveling and that she’d give me a ride if I needed since I don’t own a car. Honestly, my thoughts went straight to human trafficking tactics. A lady I don’t know asking to travel with me? She also said “[she helps] people with their small businesses” and didn’t elaborate. My thoughts then went straight to pyramid schemes. Other activities she suggested though: getting coffee, biking and skating at the beach, all things that sound fun for me. I was unsure, so I asked for her number and said I’d text. I still haven’t. I enjoyed talking with her and like the types of quality time she suggested, but I don’t know how my gut feels.

Should I take a risk and text her, maybe meet up at a public place? I have a history of trusting the wrong people, so I don’t know what to do. I want more friends, but I want to protect myself too, ya know? What are your thoughts?

1 comment
  1. “Helping people with their small businesses” certainly raises a red flag for me, but it could mean completely nothing. Maybe she just felt like befriending a stranger today. As long as you aren’t being stupid by giving her your back account or getting blackout drunk you should be okay. Feel free to explore this relationship further, but don’t be stupid about it.

Leave a Reply
You May Also Like