Wife and I, married for 10 years just this year with few cute kids, started this online thing of talking to random people who become online friends. Now it feels like we are indulged into too many fantasies. It is normal, or we need to talk. It is a good game going for her. I am also open to have a +1 for her but not a romance partner.
How to make it clear with out ruining it?
3 comments
Honest communication, both ways, no ultimatums.
Set aside a time when you can both be fully present for the conversation, and talk about what you are both looking for from these online friends. Ask her about her thoughts on open relationships. Be clear about what you want and are ok with (e.g. having other sexual partners is fine, but I still want to be romantically exclusive) and ask her what she wants and would be ok with. Talk about sexual health and safe sex practices, and make sure you are on the same page about using barriers, birth control, and getting STI testing. Also, make sure, before either of you does anything intimate with these online friends, that you are clear about expectations (I.e that this is *not* going to turn into a romantic relationship and you/her just want casual hookups.) if what you want and what they want doesn’t line up (like if they *are* looking for romantic entanglement) don’t do it.
But you do have to talk about it, otherwise one of you will assume the other is ok with something they’re not and both of you will get hurt.
You married a 19 year old… How old was she when you started dating 👀