People who had abusive parents, how has it affected your adult life ?

8 comments

1. Omg. That would take a book to explain. Basically, the way my mother used to tear me down, berate and belittle me? That became my inner voice. I constantly battle self esteem issues. Being reminded that I was the product of a rape has made me question my right to exist at all. And the physical? Oh mercy. My body still feels the stings from the belts, I am in so much pain constantly. My skin still feels bruised even after years. I have a personality disorder, DID, shaken baby syndrome, anxiety, depression, and several health issues because of what she used to do to me and put me thru. I’m walking trauma, there’s nothing human left to me.

2. Horrified of anyone getting upset and raises their voice, even if it’s not directed towards me. Feeling guilty about everything. I feel like I’m wrong for doing something for myself or doing my makeup or hair.

3. Intensely. I had several toxic and abusive relationships, a very low self steam during my teenage years, so little happy moments in my life since my early years. Now, with almost 30yo, with a lot help of my therapist and my psychiatrist I’m a better person in so many ways. And btw I left the terrible relationships behind and now I’m married to the most loving guy I’ve ever met. But yes. It was hard and painful until leaving their home (in my early 20s). I don’t even like thinking about it to be very honest. It seems to me now all my infant and teen time were all black, dark, sad and hopeless. 🙁

4. I’m extremely independent, and not in touch with 99% of my family, as they disapproved of me cutting off my abusive parent. Not sure if it’s had any other effects.

5. I cry when people shout or whenever there’s a loud noise in general. Also, I live with my SO and still sometimes automatically ask if i can eat food from my own fridge

6. Pretty badly, I’ve got EUPD, I’ve been abusive to my bf (not an excuse just saying it plainly), me and my sister have a strained relationship sometimes etc

7. My mother was an emotionally unavailable alcoholic. As an adult, I now have a hard time connecting with people, especially women, and have an incredibly hard time accepting help. Also promiscuity and low self esteem.

8. I have very high standards for having kids.
   I’m also a redditor.