Why do people say they’re “grateful” you brought up something that bothered you that they said?

15 comments

1. So they know how to improve moving forward

2. It’s like a proof of trust. That’s about it.

3. The vast majority of the time I just want the people around me to be happy. If I cross a line I want to know so I can fix that, but not everyone will be willing to say something about it.

   I may or may not phrase it that way, but I am grateful for feedback.

4. Because otherwise the issue would fester and become an even bigger problem down the road. That is, if they’re being sincere.

5. Because if they don’t tell me, it’s likely I’ll do it again, and I don’t want to do things that bother people if I can help it.

6. Because I know it was probably not easy to do, and I am grateful that I know I did something that affected someone so I can fix it if needed.

7. Because communication is key for any kind of relationship, be it friend or more. We do not instantly know others and what may or may not bother them

8. Because sometimes we are unintentionally offending someone.

9. You can’t fix a problem you don’t know doesn’t exist.

10. It’s also a non threatening way of forward movement through tough conversation. Basically a approach to middle ground

11. Because I can’t read minds. If I offend someone, I like to know so that I can apologize and avoid making the same mistake.

12. One of two reasons. The good reason is because they are happy you’re making them aware of something they said that could sour the relationship. Often times people don’t do that, and instead get increasingly annoyed with you and disparage you to others. This creates an opportunity to stop that. The bad reason is because they are getting defensive and saving face. It lets them look like the bigger person but they are going to disparage you to others.

13. Because they’re grateful that they have a chance to know what not to do in the future, instead of you getting mad at them for not being a mind reader.

14. Self improvement is a lifelong journey

15. Sometimes it’s because I may be saying things that bother someone and I didn’t know it. I can make sure that I don’t intentionally make them uncomfortable even if it’s something that not everyone has an issue with.

    Sometimes it’s because a phrase, or word, or idea I have is a hurtful one and I never thought about that before. They make me see another side of it and I change myself for the better because of it.