For some context, I really like someone and I’ve been on two dates with them, with the third one coming up. We haven’t had the exclusivity talk yet so we’re not exclusive but the dates are going really really well and we both like each other.
I went out clubbing with friends last night at uni and I had the mindset that if someone made a move on me then it would be fine. My drinks affected me way more than I expected, I got very drunk, multiple guys kissed me and I let them. I’m not in a relationship so to speak but I feel so guilty, it was so unlike me. If I was in an official relationship I would 100% not do things with anyone else but even so I just feel so so so bad. I almost feel obligated to tell him despite the fact that we’ve never had that talk and we’ve been on two dates.
I think I’ll tell him about it if it comes up. I also know that if I had set boundaries for myself then I definitely wouldn’t have let it happen. I guess it’s a good sign because I already feel so attached to him and doing things with anyone else has completely lost its appeal but is it logical for me to feel this bad about it?
2 comments
You shouldn’t feel bad, as long as everyone is aware of their place in any relationship.
Should you tell him? If you’re talking about your past lovers etc., then yes. I generally think it’s the honest approach anyway to offer up that info. He may be doing the same or may not like it, but you haven’t betrayed anyone.
If it’s not the norm to kiss so many guys then of course you’ll be upset. Never underestimate the confidence and energy that comes from the onset of a possible new relationship. It’s empowering and can send your libido crazy. Good luck!
If he told you he’d kissed multiple girls this past night, would you be upset?
The answer will let you know how you feel. If the answer is yes, then maybe you should have the exclusivity talk sooner rather than later. But make sure you’re fully up front about what interactions you’ve had, and ask him to be equally as up front, so you can both make a decision based on full disclosure.