(been together for 2yrs)
I was out with some girlfriends all night, I hadn’t heard from him all night, no text, no call, which is fine- but abnormal for us. He played his video game all night. I texted him and asked if he’d pick me up because I didn’t want to drive under the influence, wanted to sleep in my bed, and cuddle w him ofc. He said yes ,, 20 min later he calls me and while we’re on the phone he says he’s too stoned to pick me up and he’s going home. Ofc I respect his decision – but I was bummed- I had thought he was on his way and I was excited. He thought I was being short on the phone, and I could tell he was kind of annoyed with me. I wasn’t trying to be short- but I was with my friends still- fast forward – I text him and ask if he’s going to bed. He said yes. (He’s a huge gamer- so when I checked discord and it said he was playing a game I wasn’t shocked) I texted him and said oh, it says your playing a game online? He said his computer must have been left on- but that he was going to bed- and didn’t like how I was treating him. (He explained that I was trying to start an argument by making him feel bad for not getting me- and he was immediately triggered when I brought up it said he was online) the conversation ended.
While this was all happening I was at my friends house eating and drinking water- I hadn’t drank anything in hours so I decided to drive home. When I got home I was expecting to lay next to him in bed but instead he came out of his game room and I could tell he was mad I was home. I wasn’t being rude I just said “you lied” because it’s been over an hour at this point since he said he was going to bed. He even shut off the ability to see that he was online on his game so I wouldn’t be able to check?! I don’t understand why he went to these extents… we got into a huge argument he told me to get it out of his room because I was invading his privacy that all he wanted was some peace and quiet and that he doesn’t like that I was in his business by checking that he was online and made me out to be the bad guy. I was so confused because he was being so rude!! I am mediately regretted driving home because I didn’t want to be there after he started yelling at me. I packed a bag and drove to a parking lot, balled my eyes out, then slept in my car. However only slept for 15 minutes. A few hours later I decided to just go home and sleep on the couch. I would hardly say I actually was able to sleep because I was so distraught all night. He left for work two hours ago, and I can’t stop replaying it all in my head. When he was yelling at me last night, he said that I was a master manipulator that he wasn’t gonna let me flip all of this on him, I didn’t name call him, I wasn’t trying to argue- but it seemed like nothing that I did could’ve changed the fact that he just didn’t want to talk to me be around me be nice to me etc.
I think he was taking his frustration out on me. He had lied to me, said that he wasn’t playing games, then I walked to the door and he was. I think he just felt guilty because he had been caught in lies- but for him to turn so nasty on me it’s not OK.. I don’t know if he’s going to text me. I don’t know if he hates me. I don’t know if I should leave before he gets home. I wish he would apologize and understand me
What do I do… I haven’t even slept 😭😭
TL;DR?
Me (f21) bf (m29)
I asked if he’d pick me up after drinking w my girls, he said yes then called me shortly after and said he was too high to get me, that he smoked and now can’t drive. I was bummed but I understood. I messaged him and asked if he was going to bed and he said yes. I check discord (and see he is online playing games) I asked if he was online bc it said so and he got triggered and said no again- turned off the ability to see that he was online- and when I got home an hour later- he wasn’t expecting me to come home ig- bc he was caught in a lie, I walked through the door and he was playing games at 4am- we got in huge fight- he yelled and said I was invading his privacy and I’m an issue- I slept in car- after he yelled to leave his game room
6 comments
Btw he’s addicted to his video game, he consistently makes it a priority over me. He plays 40+hrs a week. Idk how he has time for it bc he works full time. Gaming is all he does, and all he seems to care about,,
If he prefers to let you sleep in a car than miss a few minutes of playing then I dont know how you put up with him. For me thats an immediate game over. Playing video games is fine, but 40+ hours a week is an addiction and he needs serious help.
Once upon a time there were golf widows. Then came the married single mothers. Now we have gaming widows
Addiction eats up the lives of the addict and everyone around him.
Please don’t settle for him. You’re in a relationship with a child. I know that in your relationship with him there is so much more bullshit that you go through than just this and I’m telling you right now, don’t waste another minute on this boy. Find a new place or temporarily go back to your parents or find a roommate idc, anything is 100x better than living with him. He needs to learn to grow the fuck up and be an adult. Right now, all he’s doing, is hindering your ability of being happy. Please, save yourself.
honestly sounds like you are insufferable
Why if he’s playing a video game is he so worried about his privacy? I have a daughter, she plays Minecraft, she loves showing us her stuff. When I play, if her mom walks into the open living room she’s like, ‘your only on that part? I’ve been finished for two weeks.’ ( I don’t play a lot, but that’s beside the point.) the point is, why does he feel like his privacy is violated? Is he jerking off? Well it’s nothing you haven’t seen before. So, what needs to be so private that he needs another room, and jumps down your throat when you pop your head in?