I’m a horribly shy person and have massive social anxiety and can never really start a convo with anyone without sweating a bucket and shaking.
So I asked someone on Instagram under their interesting art video if they wanna go grab coffee and talk about films and art, and to my surprise they said “I’d love that”.
Ok, me being the awkward me, started right after messaging them and talking about films and this person keeps responding to my messages and they’re chill.
The thing is I have a private Instagram account that I use for many years just to track my favorite artists’ work. I’m a shy person and never post photos of myself online….
Now with this person, I don’t know how to proceed and make that coffee happen. I want them to feel 100% safe and not be under pressure. I don’t want to come off as creepy, so I think I should share some photos so they will know I’m a real person and not some weirdo online? They haven’t seen me yet.
But how do I go about sharing photos? “Hey I don’t want to come off as a stranger, but I don’t normally post photos of myself online, so here are some so you know I’m not a fake?”
I’m so scared to eff this up because I feel like I genuinely can be friends with this person and we have a lot in common to talk about.
Also I don’t know at what point I should ask them if they wanna go finally for that coffee.
3 comments
Send them a photo and tell them, this is what I look Like so you know who you’re meeting at the coffee shop. You can tell them you don’t post pics of yourself for privacy reasons.
You are overthinking this and spiraling out.
Pause, breathe, and quiet down the anxious thoughts.
This person said they were cool with meeting up for coffee and a chat. Done. You do not need to send a photo unless they ask for one. You do not need to worry about them feeling safe or whatever – this is just meeting up for coffee. Just coffee; this is not a marriage proposal, this is not life or death – just coffee and a chat.
Repeat that and let it be your mantra.
Set up a time and place to meet up.
Focus on keeping your thoughts and behavior calm. What kind of art do you plan to talk about?
[deleted]