I can’t take overprotective parents much longer
I (15f) can’t take my overprotective parents much longer
Background: growing up I had food allergies and severe asthma. Nothing worked, I was in and out of the hospital constantly. Even laughing too hard could give me an attack. My mom was amazing. She worked so hard to protect me. I don’t want this post to sound like I’m ungrateful.
As I got older my health improved. I’m 15 and as long as I take care of myself I’m pretty much a normal teenage girl. I haven’t had a hospital visit in a year which is a record.
My parents still treat me like a sick five year old. My mom requires me to take my medication in front of her. I’ve never been allowed to go on a sleepover or an overnight trip. If I get a cold they’re angry with me and they are both awake all night listening to see if I start coughing.
I found out today I’m not going to be allowed to go to my extended family’s iftar because my dad is afraid I’ll eat something I’m allergic to. I’m going to be left home alone. I’ve gone before with no problem but he has a problem now.
I can’t take this any more, I’m about to break. I begged them to just give me some space and I can’t get that either. Tonight I put my headphones on and buried myself in bed and cried. My mom pounded on the door to tell me to take my meds before I fell asleep. How do I tell them they’re driving me crazy without hurting their feelings?
Tldr:.My overprotective parents still treat me like a sick kid.How do I get them to back off without hurting their feelings?
3 comments
You need to sit down with them and tell them this.
You need to try not to cry, because that would play into their narrative that you’re incapable and not to be taken seriously. Write down your points, practice saying them.
This is a tough thing to do, exactly because you’ve been being treated like this by them for so long. Tough for you to say, tough for them to hear. But it needs to be done.
First of all, i think you should start taking the power of your decisions in your hand.
Start with small decisions like i’m going for a walk or i’m going out for sometime.
Stop asking them and start telling them but initially, go with small things because they are definitely gonna freak out.
Parents can never be okay with letting go of the control they’ve had from years.
Having clear conversations might not be possible in some cases as they might neglect what you’re saying considering they still take you as a child.
Show them that you’re capable of handling your things and yourself. Keep putting it out that you’re turning into an adult now indirectly through conversations.
In some cases when they question you, give them the reasonings. For that you’ve to be very clear about your things in your own head.
Tell them that you’re an adult and now you’re learning to deal the world, you might make some mistakes on the way but you’re gonna learn.
Take your medicines before giving your mother a chance to come and tell you to do so.
Just wanted to tell tou that you’re not alone and you’ll come out of this. Just keep taking steps little by little. Long way to go girl 🙂
This may not be something that you want to hear but it is the truth.
You may be helpless for a while until you can move out on your own.
I once had parents that forced me to go to things that I despised. I mean, it was wrong.
I told them SO many times, so many different ways. But they just beat me into submission…
I was helpless until I got older and am now finally moving out.
Point is that your parents may very well just not listen and you may just be stuck living this life until you can move out on your own and create a life of your own.
I’m sorry about your situation.