Men that get matched and likes on dating apps, what’s the best way to get success?

18 comments

  1. Besides genetic stuff, I’d say knowing how to dress and groom yourself. I’d say if you have some women friends/acquaintances do be afraid to run an outfit by them and have them help take your pictures.

    Also if you’re going to do a funny bio or something know your audience. A self deprecating joke isn’t gonna land with every one and may make them swipe left.

  2. Find amateur photographer who is starting out, give him $50 to snap bunch of photos for you.

    First photo: headshot, minimal touch ups.
    Second photo: lean on a nice car at local meetups.
    Third photo, outside doing something.
    Fourth photo: eating out or passing a drink to some one.copy Leonardo Dicaprio toast pose.

  5. Group photos, pics of you doing a hobbie, generally put some personality into your bio, then play the numbers.
    Women all like different things visually and personality wise so just stick to it and be yourself.

  8. So I’ve done bodybuilding for a most of my life, played football prior and get decent matches occasionally. I primarily use hinge but most of what I get are just undesirable (for me at least they might be good fits for others). Apps are weird man, I don’t even respond on them anymore or swipe on anyone. I really suggest just getting out there and just meeting people, it’s so much easier and to me more enjoyable. Like getting matched with an attractive lady is nice but there’s a lot of folks like me and they’re all on hinge too.

    You know your strength and weaknesses, go out there and have some fun in your life man… if a woman comes around yay if not youre having fun regardless. A lot of what I’ve came across on these dating sites are pretty self absorbed individuals, they know how attractive they are, they treat people fairly superficially.

  9. Be honest, confident, and have something interesting to talk about. Having adorable rescue dogs helps too. I get a lot of swipes from people who want to talk about dogs.

  11. Understand that women are visual on dating apps, so a flattering photo of yourself should be the primary focus. Well groomed, well dressed, and preferably in a social setting with good lighting.

  12. A professional (or semi-prodessionsl) portrait helps, especially if you have a well-fitted suit.

    Highlight what makes you unique or your best qualities.

    Honestly, though, one of the biggest factors isn’t what you put into your profile, its what you’ve put into your life so far. Have you kept healthy, do you have a decent career, do you seem dependable? Do you have interesting hobbies that potential mates would like to join you in? Do you have an uncommon but useful skill? For success, your profile should work like polishing a gem, not trying to convince people iron pyrite is actually gold.

    Dating apps were hit and miss for me at first, then one small change to my profile opened up far more possibilities… I graduated from med school. That just illustrates the importance of working on the person behind the profile.

  13. Mirroring.

    Have you ever wondered why, if women say, “We don’t like topless gym selfies, nor do we like pictures of the fish you caught”, men keep posting gym selfies and photos of them with a fish? It’s because in our pea-brains, we go, “If I were a woman, I’d want a man who’s pretty and also has the skills to keep me and my offspring alive.” We’re advertising what we ourselves find attractive.

    What if I told you women do the exact same thing? The pictures of them jumping at the grand canyon, or on the red carpet at the film fest, or at the 5-star restaurant, or on a hike. They’re advertising what they themselves find attractive.

    So, with that in mind, once you’ve spent enough time on the app in your region, you should get a good sense of what the majority of women’s profiles have in them. Change your profile to match that. And stop treating you as the thing being advertised. You’re not. Your lifestyle is what you’re advertising. You want to craft your profile that shows you doing things that make her go, ‘Awww… I wish I could do that with a man!’ That’s why mirroring her profile is so important. You’re advertising to her that your lifestyle allows you to do that stuff she wants to do, greatly increasing the odds you’ll get a swipe, because she wants you to take her on that thing.

    Then once you get the match, make sure you can back up everything your profile advertises, and you’re good to go. First goal is get the swipe, second goal is turn on the charm. She swipes your profile for your lifestyle, but keeps talking because of you.

  15. Watch this video [The Mathematics of Love | Hannah Fry](https://youtu.be/yFVXsjVdvmY)

    The part “how to win at online dating” is a really good lesson. You’re not trying to date every single person on earth, just one (or maybe a handful if you’re poly). Because of this, you don’t need to generically appeal to every single person on earth and you’ll have better success if you lean into the stuff that makes you unique.

    Say you’re really into Metroid cosplay. If you put that on your profile somehow, many people may indeed be turned off by that and swipe left. But there will be some people who not only find it attractive, but find it *really* attractive, and you’ll have a much better chance with them. You’ll stand out from the crowd and they’ll actually want to message you. If youatvh with them, you’ll probably instantly get a message asking about your Metroid cosplay stuff. You probably do this yourself when swiping if you think about it enough. There’s probably that one hobby/physical attribute/etc. where if you see a profile with it, you’ll break your thumb swiping right.

    A second thing, is to look at your completed profile and ask if it sets a potential suitor up to easily send an opening message. Pictures of you somewhere or doing something interesting are great for this. If you’re using an app that has prompts, pick ones that either ask them a question, or reveal something about you that is easy to comment on and is engaging. If there are no prompts, ending your bio with a *good* question isn’t a bad idea.

    Thirdly, think of every component of your profile as a way to tell the other person about you. If you get 6 pictures, don’t make all of them essentially the same picture of you with different clothes. The context of the pictures should tell the person more about you. Examples of two good ones and one bad one:

    * Picture of you on a camel in the desert: Dude must like traveling and is a little adventurous
    * Picture of you with a boat you built: must be a pretty handy person and is into boats
    * Picture of you standing in front of a random wall in your city: this person exists, and this is what they look like. Avoid this when possible.

    Beyond that, the usual advice applies. Have good pictures (make sure your Metroid cosplay picture is a good one), have a good bio, don’t swipe indiscriminately, and have a knowledgeable friend review your profile (or post it on a relevant sub on Reddit).

  17. I have had a lot of success on hinge and bumble (tinder is mostly bits)
    And I just have a lot of goofy pics of me being artsy and creative. I think just focusing on the framing of your photos has more to do with it than anything. I don’t get a lot of matches though, normally 1/4 girls. So maybe there’s better advice here. I just do what works for me.

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