I’ll keep it succinct: I met this girl at my university years ago and she was really into me. Really just googly eyed and I was naive I guess and never perceived it as anything more than platonic.
– Fast forward a few years she needed temp help for a gig during Art Basel (Miami) so we worked together and it was an experience amazing venue and people – all great. One night, I’m more mature this time around so I picked up what she was putting down, and when I drop her off at home we kiss, she might’ve even made the move don’t remember but it was steamy and smooth. Spent the next few days working together all good, no hooking up just good viiibes.
– Boom, Art Basel is over she ghosts me. I hit her up we chat online via ig story replies and other light-hearted engagements. I went back to not caring but saw her in person a year later and it was a drunk night but super huggy feely like let’s reconnect; thought we were on the same page obv not. No texts back, nothing. Maybe some ig stuff, she watches all of my story posts.
– Fast forward to last night I’m at an art thing with friends and I see her. At this point, I’m super chill:
I’m on a body journey so my physique is pretty good. I was wearing all black and I abandoned the idea of dating her. So it’s just an old friend. And I know she felt that energy.
– I’m a towering figure she locked eyes with across the room we hug chat, introduce to my bros then kinda play around flirty, we brushed general dating and marriage lightly and funniliy, she tells me she’s crazy, and that’s why we aren’t dating rn, whatever. Physically she’s the type I would date, her career and interest fascinate me. I said ” let’s get dinner sometime” she says yeah, we finish with a hug and a Miami cheek kiss but I hold the hug an extra sec and give her lip to cheek and she melts and laughs.
I want to date this woman but I feel like I’m spinning my wheels here. What is this?
2 comments
> Guys sit this one out
You don’t have to be a woman to notice you never actually locked down plans. “Dinner sometime”? We can chatter about gender equality, feminism, evo-psych, and patriarchy all day, but you don’t have to be a PUA to know that women *stereotypically* expect you to lead. At least in the beginning. And you don’t have to be a fourth-wave feminist to know that if she says No, it’s best to accept the No.
> she tells me she’s crazy
It’s general life advice for men and women to not fall in love with crazy. Probably shouldn’t have sex with crazy either but eh people are weak when horny
Why do guys need to sit this one out? Anyone regardless of their gender can see you didn’t bother to ask her out on a legitimate date. Ask her out and if she declines then take the loss and move on. The “dinner sometime” ain’t gonna cut it. If you want a yes or no try to make actual plans with her for a specific date and time.