My partner told me that when we have sex even if I take charge I don’t necessarily commit and there’s always a vibe of this is still just pretend (which is true I think I’m not fully comfortable letting go so I laugh and get awkward when either of try to be super dominant or take charge)
Any tips on ways I can take charge the next time we have sex?
3 comments
**Peg him.**
When he tells you to take charge, climb on top, make him fold his arms together behind his head. Get low, so your tits are in his face, hold his elbows with both hands while you ride as good as you can…don’t listen to one request to slow up or stop…just make that man nut while in full control…then you’re in charge fully forever
The mistake that so many women make when exploring how to become dominant is that they think they need to make drastic, massive changes in their attitude and actions. Thankfully this isn’t the case at all. In fact, if you suddenly change your attitude, you may even freak your man out, which is obviously not the goal at all.
Try initiating: Kiss your man when he’s not expecting it. Run your hand up and down his thigh to let him know what you’re thinking about. Take him by the hand and lead him somewhere private, then start unbuckling his belt. Push him down onto your bed. Try some ‘women on top’ sex positions. Gently bite his lip. Start with the easier things and you’ll quickly notice how easy & fun it is!
Even if you eventually wind up dominating your man hardcore with whips and blades, don’t expect to do that from the beginning. Learning how to be dominant and, perhaps more importantly, be a good domme to a partner takes time. Being a good dominant requires experience.
You should start with activities that are less intense or extreme
On the other hand, dominating your man doesn’t need to be super extreme. If you only ever feel like commanding him to do a few mostly-vanilla acts (vanilla, in this context, refers to non-kinky sexual activities), that’s okay, too! Just wielding that power can be highly erotic, and the two of you can experience the flow of power between you. Initiating sex and instructing your partner what to do might not be super kinky, but it’s a great start and can help you to have better sex!