I have a people problem

So, I’m a male 25. I don’t have too much friends, jus the right ones.. I have a really toxic behavioral trait, that ulitmately leads me to loosing everyone and everything around me. I keep pushing everything and anything away from me, no matter how much they like me, and I like them. I lost a bunch of really good friends and people, because I can’t seem to stop asking myself why people want to be around me, and why someone would like me. So I rather enjoy being alone and mean to everyone… To mention, I have a really bad relationship to my parents also. I cant stop being like this. It’s so hard to be normal to the ones I really like. It’s driving me crazy and making me sad.