Is he (27 M) using me (24 F) or does he like me? Should I ask or is it too soon?

I’m sorry if my grammar isn’t perfect, I’m not a native english speaker.

Okay, here we go!

I (24 F) met a guy (27) about six weeks ago through some mutual friends at uni. (Since then we’ve seen each other pretty much everyday at uni, together with our friends). The first time we met we were out with our friends and we really hit it off. We share the same interests for books and movies and we spent the night talking about it. At the end of the night he invited me home and I said yes because it felt so right, even though I usually don’t go home with guys the first time I meet them.

After that night, he reached out to me and we’ve since been seeing each other, just the two of us, for two or three times a week (beyond hanging out at uni every day). We realized that we have a lot in common and when we see each other we talk A LOT. We hang out, we cook together, we watch a lot of movies and talk about literature and other things. He has told me so many private things that I feel like I now know everything about him, and vice versa. I know that he was in a relationship for five years that ended a year ago. I know that he felt pretty choked in the last two years of that relationship since his ex was dealing with mental health problems. She was very controlling, didn’t let him travel or hang out with his friends without blowing up his phone and giving him a bad conscience all the time. When they broke up, they both knew it was for the best and there is no bad blood between them today. He moved in with a friend for a while until he got his own apartment just a few months ago. This is the first time he is living by himself, since he moved in with his friends right after high school an then moved in with his ex.

A month after we met I felt like I had to know if he saw our relationship as something casual or if he thought there might be potential for something more in the future. He said that you never know what might happen but that he’s not searching for a relationship since he has made a lot of traveling plans with his friends in the summer and also because he is feeling pretty bad about being almost 30 and never lived alone before. He says that he needs to keep working on himself for a while before he can commit to anything, but that it’s stupid to be completely closed to the possibility of falling for someone – “if it happens, it happens”. He also said that with me he sees it as we’re getting to know each other to see what happens, and that he really likes spending time with me since we’re so much alike and have a lot of fun together.

I was satisfied with the answer because all I really wanted to know was if it was casual or not. Anyways, we kept seeing each other and I even spent three days in a row at his place. One of those nights, he accidentally opened Tinder on his phone when he was going to show me something. He apologized profusely and was really ashamed. I didn’t worry, since I also have Tinder and use it from time to time to pass some time. But this whole thing got us into the discussion of dating and I asked him if he has dated a lot and he said that he hasn’t. He said a that Tinder was basically just to pass time and that he is too shy to meet someone for a real date because it so easily gets awkward. “I haven’t dated much at all, maybe like two times if I don’t count our dates”.

We met again a few days ago and I was writing on my essay while he cooked for me. He told me that it’s so comfortable to hang out with me because he feels so safe with me, like he could tell me anything, and that he doesn’t feel that way with anyone else.

Here is the issue: except for when we see each other irl, we barely talk. Not on social media or anything. I know that he is not a texter or a frequent user of social media, but it feels strange. If you like someone, I’d think you’d want to reach out to them, right? I also saw on a friends phone that he added another picture to his Tinder profile… As I said, I also use Tinder but it still feels weird…

As you can see, there’s a number of things pointing towards him not being interested in me but I also feel like there’s a lot of things pointing towards the opposite.

I know that he told me that he is not really looking for a relationship, but he also said that it wasn’t out of the question. I’m pretty sure that his idea of a relationship is connected to how it was with his ex: he fears that he will be controlled again and maybe that a relationship will get in the way of his traveling plans. However, I am not like her. I value personal space and freedom highly. I would never be controlling nor want to be controlled.

We’ve only been seeing each other for six weeks so it’s too early to get into a relationship, even for me, but I feel like I truly like him, and I want him to like me too. I know I could ask but I don’t want to seem pushy. What do you guys think? Is it doomed? He doesn’t want a relationship (with me) and I should just let it go? Or is there a chance? Should I ask?

I’m so scared of him not liking me back. Partly because I truly enjoy spending time with him and I don’t want to lose that. And, partly, because we will keep seeing each other Every. Single. Day. Because of our mutual friends. I don’t want to hear about him meeting someone else and I don’t know how to get over him when he’s there all the time. What do I do? Am I being overly anxious?

TL;DR! Dated a guy for six weeks who said he isn’t looking for a relationship but that it’s stupid to say that there isn’t a possibility that he will fall for someone anyways. He said that we are really good together and that he wants to get to know me. He seems like he likes me but is also showing signs of not liking me, like not reaching out over the phone when we’re not seeing each other. It’s only been six weeks but I’m afraid that I’m falling and he’s not. Do I ask? We see each other every day since we have mutual friends at uni and I don’t want it to be awkward and I don’t want to hear about him seeing someone else.

Please help me think straight. I feel like i’m going insane and I probably sound like it as well.

Thank you!