GUYS HELP ME. Okay one of my really good friends moved to a new city. There’s an open invite to come visit her.
Here’s the thing. We’ve travelled together before, and whenever we do things, I’m beyond exhausted from the late nights. I know I sound old, but I need beauty sleep.
We used to party A LOT in college together so there’s this notion that we’ll still vibe when we go out but guys I literally hate going out. Like I try to be peppy and hip but i just cannot deal. bc everyone goes out. Also:
1. I had a drinking problem and am completely sober and am doing SO much better but i’m SO sensitive. My friends don’t understand how big of a deal this is to me but I also haven’t really gotten the opportunity to explain it in person.
2. It’s such a waste of time to me…we spend the night out and the most obnoxious person is considered fun. The whole next day blows away bc you’re so sleep deprived and I don’t want to spend money to be sad and sleepy.
My soul is aching bc I feel like I SHOULD visit (also starting a new job/school soon so my time is going to be super strapped) but I’m also like am I a bad friend if I don’t want to deal with the chaos of everything. Am I being a scrooge? How do I go but not have to go out?? If I stay with her I literally will sound so creepy like “oh i’m gonna stay in while you party on”…
1 comment
Sounds like you suffer from a case of “ I play it cool to fit in but when push comes to shove and I have to display my real personality things get tricky”.
I have been there. I have a very simple proposal for you.
It will sound obvious or obnoxious, but if you think about it you will realise that it’s probably the best thing to do from most perspectives.
So here it is: Be honest, explain to your friends what’s going on inside your head. Explain to them what you just explained to us here.
If I was your friend and you told me this, I would totally understand and respect the fact that you still want to see me. We would stay home and chill together or whatever else you wanted.
I understand not everyone things like that, but think of it this way: If you take the effort to open your heart and explain to them what’s up, and they still don’t get you, how sure are you that you are truly friends??
Hope I helped, overall you sound like a cool and honest person, you can add me on Twitter (@batwez7) if you are interested in self-dev stuff 😁