Birthday ideas when you’re broke, tired, and in love? (29F with 30M)

Tldr; making your partner feel special on a (financial and psychological) budget

Background: my (29F) husband (30M) husband and I have been married two years, together for nine, I want to wow him on a budget.

I try to do good on his birthdays. Definitely a homemade cake, usually plan either a dinner or friends coming over, always a gift of some kind. But I feel like I’m not going to be able to “live up” this year.

See the previous years I made <$13000 a year while working part time while getting my PhD. This last year I’ve worked not at all because of the strenuous unpaid necessities of my doctoral program. My husband makes very good money and pays 95% of our bills, as well as buying himself hobby items, trying to convince me to let him spend more money on me, and being incredibly generous to friends and strangers.

I try! This Valentine’s day I stopped for flowers (he likes them, I don’t) and dark chocolate when I knew he was stressed and forgot. I love, LOVE to give gifts and I try to do whatever I can for birthdays and Christmas, especially for my partner. On years I earn money I’ll spend a few hundred on something he’s been talking about for months. The year before last I got him a bunch of a snack he liked and attached love notes to them, made him a fancy cake, grabbed a couple items he’d been wanting, and cooked dinner. Last year I planned a surprise party with all his friends, baked up a storm, provided party provisions, and got him a couple nice whiskey glasses.

But I have very, very little disposable income this year and, importantly, I’ve been tired and stressed. He’s been so stressed with work too. My little creative brain is hibernating. But I really can’t spend much without the burden ending up on my partner. If I spend like $100 right now on a gift he’d end up subsidizing it later tbh (I will start having an income again in August but it’s a $35k yearlong internship, and I have <$3000 in my personal account until then).

I want to make it special for him. Even a small special thing like a nice dinner at home feels so expensive right now. We’ve both been so stressed and I don’t have new ideas right now to express how much I love him and appreciate his support and I really just want to make him light up a bit.