Me and my wife haven’t had sex for over 3 months and I’ve had a vasectomy 2 years ago.
She recently took a test and it came back negative.
I’m wondering why would she even take a test in the first place if there’s no possible way she could get pregnant from me.

Is she cheating?

40 comments

  3. Having a 3 year old vasectomy baby running around my house as I type this….they aren’t fool proof.

  4. Does your wife suffer from anxiety? Some people who have a fear of pregnancy will do irrational things like this. They know it’s irrational but it appeases the anxiety. And of the other option is she is cheating but anxiety is what I’m leaning more towards.

  5. Honestly, I’ve taken pregnancy test even when i hadn’t had sex in months just because I felt fat. Vasectomies are not one hundred percent and if she is adamantly childfree, especially if you are in a state where abortion access is limited, I would believe she was taking one for her own peace of mind. You’ve had a vasectomy so obviously sounds like kids were not in your plan.

  6. Honestly when I feel slightly off and I can’t attribute it to anxiety/ stress, allergies, illness. I take a test.
    My circumstances are a bit different but it doesn’t matter if I’ve had sex 24 hours ago or 9 months.

    No hate to you OP, but was it a pee-stick test or a strip test? Ovulation strips and pregnancy strips are very similar.

  7. Honestly when I feel slightly off and I can’t attribute it to anxiety/ stress, allergies, illness. I take a test.
    My circumstances are a bit different but it doesn’t matter if I’ve had sex 24 hours ago or 9 months.

    No hate to you OP, but was it a pee-stick test or a strip test? Ovulation strips and pregnancy strips are very similar.

  8. I had a tubal however you better bet your ass I’ll take a pregnancy test if I’m having any pregnancy symptoms

  9. Sometimes our bodies are weird. I took a post vasectomy test one time because my period ended up skipping for no reason and even though I was 99% sure, I might as well be certain.

  10. Vasectomies fail, tubal ligations fail (speaking from experience on the latter). Ask your wife before you jump to conclusions.

  11. I was taking them when I was a freaking virgin.

    Not getting a period fucks with your head.

  12. She was probably late with her period and just wanted to be sure she wasn’t 3 months pregnant.

  13. I had a friend just last year get his wife pregnant. His tubes grew back and his doctor confirmed it.

    I’m

  14. 1) Vasectomies are not 100%.
    2) Maybe she wants to kids and was hoping to see a positive pregnancy test.
    3) If she isn’t feeling well and wants to seek medical treatment or care, it’s always the first damn thing they bring up. I had tubal ligation and I still get asked lol.
    4) Maybe late period or questionable spotting and she is just as confused as you are.

  15. Because that show from TLC In the early 2000’s really messed us up, we are all paranoid we’ll somehow be pregnant and not know it until we go into labor and think we’re dying or something.

  17. If you decide to bring it up with her, don’t be accusatory. Just state the facts that you have: “I saw a pregnancy test in the bathroom.” And let her say what she needs to say. Don’t get yourself in trouble by assuming.

    ETA: I just thought of this. Does she have a friend or relative that is trying to get pregnant (or avoid it?) That person could have come over to do the test because sometimes you need a support person when you’re taking a pregnancy test. Your wife could have just been helping someone out?

  18. If she were cheating, you probably wouldn’t even know about the test. There have been times I have felt pregnant and took a test with a negative result.

  19. I have anxiety ALL THE TIME that i’m pregnant even if it’s irrational. I’d just ask her about it.

  21. My husband had his test to check and make sure he had no swimmers. It came back zero. A month later, I was a day late and FREAKED. Took a test. It was negative but my anxiety went down. Vasectomies aren’t always full proof.

  22. My husband had a vasectomy two years ago, I am 100% faithful and I *often* do pregnancy tests.

    I get pregnancy anxiety all the time.. sometimes I feel a bit weird and so I take a test.

    Vasectomies aren’t 100% effective.

    She *may* be cheating, but I wouldn’t take that test as proof. I literally have a bulk pack of pregnancy tests in the cupboard right now just in case I get worried.

  24. Women sometimes feel pregnant or think they do. Tender breasts can be pregnancy or pre period discomfort. Bloating, cravings, etc can be either or. Missed periods can happen for a number of reasons and so can lighter periods which sometimes indicate an early pregnancy too. Maybe she’s regretting that you had a vasectomy and is doing some wishful thinking that it will fail.
    Talk to her. Ask her why she tested. Did she feel symptomatic, does she actually want another child? Don’t assume the worst if she’s given you no other reason to doubt her. This is how marriages fail. Lack of communication.

  26. My period just likes to not show up so I take them. And I also know an alarming amount of women who didn’t know they were pregnant for months. Even had periods while pregnant so it’s still a valid anxiety. Plus a vasectomy isn’t full proof. They also have an alarming failure rate.

  28. Unless she has a super flat tummy it could take a while for a pregnancy to show.

    I have an IUD and take a test every month or when I am suddenly paranoid because I feel “weird” and immediately think it seems like a pregnancy symptom.

    If she was cheating I doubt she would take the test at home if you two hadn’t had sex in 3 months.

  29. How old is she? Perimenopause can start quite young (late 30s early 40s) and shares a lot of symptoms with early pregnancy.

    Honestly, I have taken pregnancy tests when my husband has been away for months (100% not cheating on him) because my period is off, or I’m having weird symptoms… I always wonder if I’m pregnant and didn’t know it? I’ve had friends who didn’t know they were pregnant until 20+ weeks so it happens!

    I would suggest just talking to her. Asking her if there’s something going on with her health that made her think she might be pregnant is probably the best/least accusatory way of asking.

  30. I do this when I am anxious and have missed a period (anxiety can also delay a period). Sometimes seeing the negative result is enough that it eases.

  31. My husband doesn’t have a vasectomy that I know of, but I’m on bc. I’ve taken them randomly just to sort of assure myself as weird as that sounds.

  32. I have highly irregular periods because of health stuff and also stress. My husband had a vasectomy years ago and very quickly got a full 0 sperm count result. I still take one when my period is extra late because I’ve heard horror stories about vasectomies not being effective for some people. And also sometimes the stress relief of that negative sign can help my body relax from the stress enough that a period starts. I have never and would never consider being unfaithful to my husband. I’m just childfree and have a lot of reasons for that and don’t want to take any chances of a freak accident happening with no time to correct it.

  33. Why are you not having sex with your wife for over 3+ months? Y’all need to figure this out before it’s too late. I would literally start walking around the house naked if my husband did this to me!

  34. Women can have irregular periods, and women can be drugged and raped while unconscious.

  35. Maybe she thought she was pregnant from 3 months ago. Maybe she’s skipped periods and wanted to cover all bases. Why don’t you ask her what her rationale is instead of expecting answers from the internet? We can’t crystal ball whether she is cheating but I think it’s suss of you to jump to that as a possibility.

  36. Sometimes when your period is late you check anyway and a vasectomy isn’t totally 100% right? Sometimes they don’t take. I would be suspicious but I don’t think it is very warranted. Maybe check for other signs…

  38. If I even feel overly TIRED I take a pregnancy test, just ask her why and move on.

    I take birth control and am very regular, my husband and I have never even had a scare, but even so, if I feel tired, nauseous, gassy, breast pain…I take a test just to be sure

  39. Jesus she told you about the test. If she was cheating and it came negative why on earth would she tell you 😂 relax man

  40. As a lot of people already mentioned here, It’s normal for woman to take tests even if there’s the slightest chance that pregnancy is on the table. Also, a lot of woman discovers their pregnancy very late (there are cases where people have to run to the hospital to have baby without know they were pregnant) so even if you had sex 3 months ago or 5 months ago, still doesn’t mean she is cheating, perhaps just trying to put her mind at easy.

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