I (24f) have two young brothers aged 16 and 12. Both of my siblings have struggled with mental health issues -the twelve year old even have suicidal thoughts. I don’t live at home with them but when I do see them it feels like pulling teeth to get any information from them. I usually get one word answers and the “everything is fine”. How would you all have liked to be supported by an older sibling when you were younger?
Edit: They do both have a therapist! Mental illness runs in the family! I just find I don’t know how to relate to teenage boys!
7 comments
If it’s gotten bad enough to reach suicidal thoughts, then they need professional help. Not to say you can’t do anything about it. I think just build a good communication bridge so they are feel free to tell you what makes them happy and what makes them sad. Once they know they can always rely on their big sister, you’ll start to figure out how to properly help because they’ll open up to you.
Functionality is the paramount metric by which we measure the worth of things personal and not. Our own heath, attractiveness. Our career and our state of mind.
‘Does It work, will it do it’s job. Is it useful at this. Am I. Is it needed, am I. Can it still do this- can I.is it a waste to do this. Will it waste time. Am I wasting time. Did I wast yours…’
One thing you could do is teach them to have healthy relationships with and understanding of women since that’s a cause for a lot of insecurity for guys
Like specifically how to talk to women, how to respect them, how to dress and look nice, etc
Not necessarily like sitting down and giving them a lecture, but little hints and encouragement here and there
First off, respect that they don’t want to talk to you about it
That’s not really your job. Just be sympathetic? And they don’t have to disclose anything to you if they don’t want to. You should respect that, and work with what they freely give you. Again, If you feel inclined, just be supportive and listen to them.
Having a concerned older sister help me to understand women would have been a godsend. Be there to answer their questions.
First step is to stop forcefully extracting information from them.
Be open if they want to talk but if they don’t just don’t go after them, they’ll just start running away even faster.
Be someone they look forwards to meeting next time you visit, let them do something their parents won’t let them do most of the time when you are around. You’ll become the cool big sister they want to share their weekly happenings with.