Hello. I’ve been seeing this guy for maybe a month and a half now. We’re not in a relationship but we’re exclusive. Both 21. I’m here on exchange.
Something happened these days and I’m not sure if I should bring it up or not. Appreciate any advice!
Sunday I realised I lost my AirPods and the “find my” app said they’re in a building close to his dads place where we were the day before, and it kept saying they’re getting used now on and off. I told him and he said I should go and check, when my place is like 45 min away from his. He didn’t offer to come with me, but then turns out he had a lunch planned with his family, so I got over it. He was texting me the whole time telling me to tell him how it goes, to leave when my battery dies, to stop knocking on ppls doors asking if they’ve found it, etc.
After 3 hours of looking, ringing doorbells, no battery, getting locked in the building, etc I went home. He said he will come with me to the police station another day and do all these things to help me like he will call his friends and they’ll look etc etc etc
I told him I’ll try to go look again the next day, and he said he has training for his new job in the morning so he doesn’t know if he can. Then turned out this training extended until 5 pm and I just got pissed and went to look by myself, put up a sign in front of the building and was on my way to the police station. He didn’t know. At 5 he texts me “I finished” and nothing more. He didn’t ask where I was, what’s going on, where he can meet me, etc. When HE KNEW this is smth that needs to be taken care of ASAP and that I was going to look again today.
at 5:15 I just texted him if his dad had found anything at his place, to which he answered “I could come with you if you want”…. long story short, he went to look at his dads place while I went to the police alone. they said I should go to another police and I just was so stressed and had a breakdown and he came to pick me up and drive me to the closest metro. I was like 5 min away from his place then.
In the car, he proposes I go try going to the other police. He doesn’t offer to come with me.
I think ultimately I just felt very let down these past 2 days and I know he had stuff to do but it bothered me he promised all these things and then ultimately I had to do everything myself and he even just suggested I go to the police alone without offering to come like he had said initially. Ultimately the vibe I got was all words and no action.
What do you think?
2 comments
Jesus Christ you’re a single adult. Welcome to being an independent adult.
>ultimately I had to do everything myself
Yeah. The same if you left your airpods at a strangers house, or in class, or on the train. You look in lost and found. You put up notices. You hope for the best or eat the cost of a buying another set.
Just because you mutually decide not to fuck any other person doesn’t automatically make him your BF or even a close friend. Stop expecting so much, or cut off the arrangement.
>When HE KNEW this is smth that needs to be taken care of ASAP
He’s not a mind reader. He said, “I finished” to let you know he’s finished. It’s up to you to tell him what happened and what the situation is. It’s your airpods, not his.