Hello. I (24M) have pretty bad social anxiety when I go out, usually with the intention of meeting people. Like, for the past 2 weekends I’ve gone to some local bars alone hoping to make new friends/ potentially meet some single women, all with the goal of getting over social anxiety in mind. But DAMN does my social anxiety kick in whenever I sit next to a stranger at the bar and end up not saying anything. I find myself so jealous of people that can converse so easily while I’m over at the bar counter sipping alone. Idk, has anyone who has experienced this have any advice for me in getting over my fear of talking to people in what are supposed to be social settings?
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St. Patrick’s Day post!
Well, I think you are further along the path than you imagine. First, you are already going out, which is a huge step. And you can tell yourself, “Even though coming here made me anxious, I still did it, and didn’t die. Which means that anxiety is a fake danger alarm, not a real indicator. And if that is the case, facing anxiety is only a matter of discomfort, not something that can actually hurt me.”
Also, there is something about getting to the point where you feel like you own a place. First time you go to a bar, it is a pretty big set of unknowns and scary. Tenth time, this is your zone, and when some hotty walks in, they are walking into your zone. Makes it easier.