So I 19(m) was talking to two friends, we started flirting casually back and forth. I’m naturally flirty, so I wasn’t aware that I gave off the impression that I was romantically interested in them. Well, I discussed beforehand with person A, that I didn’t want to do long distance, unless we could see each other.
We were also regularly communicating about the people we were matching with on bumble, tinder, and who we were attracted to etc.
They brought up the idea to visit, and I Essentially said “sure why not”. Well, a person I’ve been friends with for a long time finally confessed that they were attracted to me, we exchanged a few NSFW images, and I confessed my attraction towards them.
I felt like I should tell friend A, so I did. They seemed upset, and I’m assuming for a valid reason. I shouldn’t have lead them on, I guess.
It’s difficult, because I really valued person a as a friend. Just didn’t see us becoming romantically involved.
Fuck, this is stressful. I feel super guilty, but I’m not sure if it’s misplaced or not. What should I do going foward?
tl;dr flirted with two friends, ended up getting involved with one, other person got upset.
Edit: so we talked.
She wasn’t that upset with me, she was upset with person b, for her actions. She told her she liked me, and she wasn’t upfront with her about this.
1 comment
Here’s the thing:
Just because somebody’s feelings get hurt doesn’t mean you did anything wrong.
You were figuring out what you wanted, and behaving as a single person. Once you had a sense that things were progressing with person B you told person A. You handled this properly.
Apologize, and give her some room to get over it. It always hurts to be rejected but she wasn’t entitled to be in a relationship with you just because you guys had been flirting. It’s NORMAL for people to be flirting around, and you chose someone else, and that kinda sucks for her …
… but we’ve all been there. And it’s okay. People get rejected and move on. And once they’re over the sting they can sometimes even go back to being friends again.