What do you do when you don’t want to be masculine but still are a (young) man 🤔

18 comments

1. Why don’t you want to be masculine? That’s probably a better question.

   What does masculinity mean to you? The term has been tossed around a lot and dragged through the mud because of thr term toxic masculinity.

   To me, being masculine means being a provider, a protector, and a rock for my family.

   Many things that men are completely allowed to enjoy are labeled as “feminine” because of assholes.

2. By masculine do you mean “ALPHA” ? Because if so, I’d highly recommend a book by Jungian analyst Robert Moore called “King, Warrior, Magician, Lover” it’s on YouTube and dives into the fundamental psychology of masculinity.

3. [deleted]

4. I got an idea, put that soy milk latte down and drink some concrete instead to harden up

   Bro I swear if your dad read this

   Do you not feel any shame at all?

   Might aswell cut your balls and your cock off and be a chick then or whatever we do in 2023

   On a serious note but why don’t you wanna be masculine ?

   Update: just looked through your post history bro and wtf

5. Who gives a shit. I dont have the same interests as most men, it doesn’t matter

6. Just be a feminine my guy…nothing wrong with being a little feminine. Just look at prince.

7. Just be you

8. Learning to accept who you are is a struggle sometimes. I dealt with it when I was young. I still have a hard time proving myself wrong about myself. I want to say the biggest hurdle I crossed was growing up and leaving home to seek my own fortune. As an adult, most people are too wrapped up in their own personal shit to care much about what others do, as long as it’s not infringing on their rights to pursue happiness.

   Find people who see things the way you do. Form friend groups and do things the way you want to do them. You might run into some naysayers but you’ll quickly find that those people don’t often have power over you, and are wasting their lives on being haters rather than looking for their own spot in the world.

9. Forgo masculinity and embrace personality. Don’t let the confines of gender expectations define you. If people, make fun of you for it than their opinions don’t matter in the first place. I’m decidedly a guy; jeans, beard, axe body spray. I still put on nail polish from time to time because fashion is king. I’ve put on eye shadow for a cosplay.

   You do you.

10. Be yourself dude.

11. That’s not a question for us normies. Be a man, stop fucking around. If you were a lion and felt that way, I would eat you!

12. Sorry to hear that. Fuck what others think. Be who you are comfortable being. You are you and you only get one life. Not worth living by other people’s wants.

    And this coming from a masciline man. You do you.

13. Everyone has their own definition of masculinity. I’m not going to conform to their definition and I don’t really care what others think.

14. I’m a masculine man, but not “macho”. Not sure what you’re shooting for in this question. Do you not want to be seen as effeminate? Do you have traits that are typically seen as gay? I’d encourage you to be who you are, the thoughts of others be damned. You’ll be happier being you, not some masculinized version of yourself to appease others. Best to you, young man.

15. masculinity is a made up concept that really doesnt mean anything

16. A lot of men shit on other men for not being masculine because they’re scared that someone else will do it to them, if they can’t direct it to a weaker target. I don’t think it’s your job to comfort these scared little boys.

17. r/asktransgender and r/eggirl are of interest for confirming or eliminating the “you’re a trans woman, Harriet” possibility.

18. You just have to be you. Find a thread of who you are and follow it to find the rest. Also understand that you will change with time.

    There is lots of good stuff associated with masculinity, like being strong and patient, that you can still value and aspire to without buying the whole package. To some degree you choose your values and there are worse ones to pick, if you’re looking for a place to start.

    It takes a whole life to find out who you are. Pay attention, be suspicious of easy fixes, and be a decent person and it’ll be as good as it can be.

    I’m curious about the “whatever I am.” I hope you find it and share it with the world.