My husband and I (31F) have been married for 2 years, and thus far, I have kept my maiden name. I don’t really want to change my name, however, we do plan to have kids, so I’m debating on whether I should change my name or not for that reason.
For those who kept their maiden name and have kids- have you had any issues having a different name?
For those who changed their name- how much of a pain was all the paperwork (particularly those in the US)?
10 comments
got married last year. changed to my husbands last name pretty quick. social security was easy and the card came within a few days. MVC was a bit of a pain in the ass bc they’re rude but once again not too bad. however, i have a son and my hubby will adopt him next year so recently i went back to hyphenate my maiden name and hubbys last name bc my son has my maiden name (not hubbys kid) if that makes sense. got my new card within less than a week too
Changing names really isn’t that much of a pain. It’s a little bit of paperwork. Honestly the hardest places to change my information were airline rewards.
My first wife kept her maiden name. Our son had my sure. When I deployed, my remarried mother had my parenting time and a new marital name. It was all a pain in the tuckas.
My opinion, whatever name you collectively choose, there is no “I” in “team”. Pick one the name.
I have been married 30 years and I did not change my name. I have had no problems with having different names from our kids or from my husband. It has literally never created a problem.
My wife of almost 26 years didn’t take my last name. The reason was it is common in our culture for women to keep their last name. I didn’t ask her then as I thought it should have come from her. It is one of few things in our marriage that hurts me up to present day. My wife offered to take my last name many years after we got married but I thought it was too late.
I changed my name a few months after we got married due to being in the process of buying a home and starting a new job- didn’t want to cause extra confusion.
It was pretty easy at the social security office, then from there it varies. Some credit cards sent me new cards without calling, the bank I had to provide my marriage certificate to change my checking account.
There will always seem to be random accounts that pop up, which vary on how easy they will update your name. Like the city water just asked me to spell it, but at the pharmacy I had to show my license to change it.
Overall it was easy but it depends how much you care to correct everything that might come your way!
I had a child before I met my husband. She has my name. I didn’t change my name till she got adopted by my husband. I wanted us all the same name, but I wouldn’t let her have a different name than me, I didn’t want her to feel left out.
Keep your name.
I have a different last name from my son and husband and it’s been a non-issue. Nobody’s ever asked for proof that I’m his mom, nobody’s questioned me why we have different last names, nothing. I’m sure that experience is going to depend on where you live and the people around you, though.
Zero issues, married for decades.
Well, I shouldn’t say zero. A few old biddies early on, let me know exactly what they thought about my choice but Idc. My husbands opinion is the only one that matters in this case. Our kid thinks it’s cool their mom has a different name (their name is their dad’s because I’m 1st Gen and I have an “ethnic” name people here find hard to pronounce… kid can take my name if they decide to later, though!)