I (24f) have recently gaigned some weight due to having to study for months so I could pass a very important exam. Luckily, I passed it and I am now on my way back to regain my original weight (I have already lost a little).
The anxiety for the exam has taken a toll on my skin to and I have a dermatitis outbreak between my breast. So, I don’t want to have sex fully naked, I want to keep my shirt on.
My boyfriend says he doesn’t care about the weight and the skin issues and that he wants to fully see me and feel my skin. How can make the situation more appealing to him until I’m back to normal?
43 comments
It sounds like your boyfriend cares about you a lot, regardless of your skin issues which is great. What about using low-lighting to have sex?
Also you ask him to feel you up and play through your shirt, as if you were naked.
He wants to give you sex in your present condition. Shouldn’t that be enough?
Take the t shirt off
maybe get a sexy shirt and make it part of the game. a bit of imagination never hurts. he might want to get your clothes off as part of the game, so you’d need to agree it stays part of the fantasy. i’d say i would be fine doing it with and without clothes, as long as it makes my partner comfortable. but i also can reassure you: guys tend to be more simple than one thinks. dermatitis or a bit more weight doesn’t really get in the way of a guy who has a thing for you and wants sex. if he tells you that is the case for him, he’s probably being honest. but -of course- you need to feel comfortable, too.
It’s also fine to keep the shirt on.
But here’s a second comment. People stress during sex. Before the next sex, you could arrange to go topless while hanging out with him, like, watching a video.
I understand being self conscious but from the man’s point of view I think you need to understand… boobs! Sex! Your orgasm! What else would we want?
Maybe as a compromise try transparent/sheer lingerie or top? It still conceals a bit but would also allow visual stimulation for him too
I doubt he’s going to mind. Seriously. You should see your PCP or campus health though. There’s steroid creams that would resolve this problem with days.
this happens a lot in relationships: trust me, your boyfriend just wants to be intimate with you and most likely doesn’t care at all about these things. ‘waiting until you’re back to normal’ can be switched for ‘getting more comfortable with your body *while* you get in better shape’. takes some courage, though.
The sexiest thing a woman can wear is confidence. Believe and trust him-he wants to see you naked. We probably all do.
With that being said, if it helps your confidence to just wear a shirt then just wear a shirt. Even if he would prefer something else, it’s your body and not his. Hopefully he can quickly figure out that it’s more beneficial to support you then it is to whine or complain. Discuss it with him and see if you two can find a compromise, but if you can’t then just stick to your decision.
I don’t see a problem with it at all.
Take it off!
Have sex with a tight tank top. When it gets hot and heavy roll your shirt down that way boobs are out a and belly hidden 😂😂😂
Turn the lights off
What you can do is a cute little cut crop top, or some of those sexy crop bras that they sell everywhere like Marshall’s, TJ Maxx, Amazon that aren’t *really* for support you know what I mean?😅 I mean they’re thin and strappy and have ruching or ties or beads, lol. I’ve used lots of those as regular sexy tops.
You can get cut or tie your own t-shirt, you can also look into fishnet body suits or tops! As a BBW/chubby woman, I LOVE the look of my body in fishnet outfits. They make my curves and everything look accentuated and sexy. They definitely give me a boost if I’m not feeling positive, it just feels like I’m putting on a whole mood. Plus they’re thin and cutout so there’s still skin.
For light belly coverage Gurl! You have to get a bustier! You have some that have breast coverage or some with half cups or no cups. But you can get pattern, silk, velvet, lace, anything you want! Get the ones that comes down to a curve point or a v at the bottom and it’ll boost your mood 💜
First, find that part in you that realizes how sexy you are and that you’re so addictive that your boyfriend *needs* you, *wants* you. Then keep that in your head while you look for things or try on things, or pick out what to wear.
He loves you exactly how you are, but all women know our minds can play games with us or chip at our confidence. Tell him you want to play around a little while you work on that. Have fun with the clothing until you get hat confidence back to take it all off. It can be fun and exciting, and then it’ll just feel so freeing and relaxing when you can get back to bare skin you.
Sex with a tshirt on isn’t going to be sexy. I’m sorry that you’re uncomfortable in your own skin, and you ultimately need to do whatever makes you feel happy and safe.
Your partner isn’t judging you or your skin, and I hope you gain the confidence in yourself that you deserve to have. But I understand wanting to shield yourself x
I would like to add that yes what everyone here said is correct. However sex should also be fun. If I were you, I would find/ buy tight tshirt then cut out your boobs, or belly button or both, or wherever you’re comfortable. At the very least, if you walk into the room he will laugh and then know what’s on the menu.
I understand the feeling hun weather your boyfriend is fine with it or not you won’t have fun if your not comfortable I would recommend having fun with it get some lingerie it’s always so much better when you feel like a sexy bad bitch do what makes you feel good
Crop top? Sheer shirt?
Just take the fucking shirt off, dudes aren’t that damn picky. Boobs equal smiles and hard-ons.
Show him more of your ass? See if he wants to do it from behind?
Try a wet or damp tshirt.
When he says he doesn’t care about all of that, believe him.
I recently had sterilization surgery and came off my bc at the same time. I’m bloated, with scars ony pelvic region that are purplish. I gained 10 lbs.
I’m also so dang horny, I can hardly control myself. My bf has zero issues with my post – surgery gut or the scars. He’s having a wonderful time, lol.
If you’re like me and still a little weird about it, wear a skirt. That way you can hike it up, hiding your belly and whatever else you wanna conceal. It still makes sex super sexy.
I don’t think all of these comments telling you to just take the shirt off and reassuring you that he doesn’t care are all that helpful. I’m sure your boyfriend genuinely does not care and loves your body however it presents on any given day.
But if you’re still not comfortable with it at the moment, he should meet you where you’re at. Not the other way around. Dermatitis doesn’t last forever.
Some suggestions though would maybe try a sheer or lacey shirt that is still partially see-through. Or similarly a piece of sexy lingerie that has a high neck line. Lowlight/candlelight could also help.
Don’t do this. Experience the intimacy of feeling good about your imperfect body with your partner. This is so silly.
Believe him. Showing vulnerability is important. Maybe dim lights?
Just tell him you feel more comfortable with a shirt on for now, if he cares about you like he says, he won’t mind. Otherwise if you really want to cater to his desire of you being nude, low lighting, or you can both compromise with sheer. Good luck.
You want it to be more appealing? Take off the shirt. Trust your guy. He wants to see you and is aroused by your naked body. Even when it’s not “perfect”
This sounds like a strong insecurity you have. I have no doubt that you will lose the weight and get your skin condition squared away, but maybe just let him see you.
This could be a way of overcoming those insecurities. It could also make your relationship stronger seeing how he finds you attractive even if you don’t feel like you are.
In relationships, we see each other at our best and at our worst. How your partner sees you at (what you may perceive to be) your worst might tell you a lot about him and yourself.
I don’t think this is a sex issue. I think it’s a mental health one. I wish you two the best no matter what you decide.
Just do it with your shirt off. Men tend to love breasts, showing yours to him will probably make him very hard, and cum a lot.
Because of my auto immune illness I have days that I feel downright disgusting. I don’t really wanna take my clothes off and my boyfriend likes having sex when I have lingerie on. I don’t have to take everything off and he’s really turned on, making me feel better about myself on those days. Give it a whirl girl!
You could put a sheer shirt on!! That like stills shows your Nipples. Supa hot
Just go completely topless in a private space and sit under a fan for a while, guys get dermatitis in between the leg and the crotch area they pretty much do the same thing dermatitis is the most annoying thing to deal with.
And I’ll be honest I understand why nudists go nude inside their house pretty much all the time when this happens to me.
Crop top?
He doesn’t care. Don’t feel like you have to hide parts of you from him.
My boyfriend loves baby tees! They’re slightly cropped and really tight on the breasts so he can still see all their movement and the shape of my body, but I don’t have to take my shirt off!! (I break out on my chest all the time and am very insecure about it)
Niether myself or my GF have skin or weight issues and have sex with our shirts on 99% of the time. Breast and nipple play is a big thing and weirdly enough, shirts don’t get in the way. It surprisingly loves less problems than it causes. But that’s just us
ain’t nothing more permanent than a temporary fix
Low to no light is likely the better option, he wants to be skin to skin and feel connected to you and not like you’re a random hookup.
How about wearing just a t-shirt? My ex used to go wild when I’d just walk around in just t-shirt and undies. You could even play it up a little and tie it to show a little more skin.
Btw, hope you aced your test.
Alright I didn’t read all the comments but kinda peeved that your feelings are being invalidated.
If it hasn’t been suggested yet, wear a shirt you like that’s as tight as your comfy with. It’ll make your boobs look cool, and everyone loves nips poking through a thin, tight shirt lol
Sexy lingerie that covers all my insecure places always makes me feel more confident and turns him on. I recommend buying crotchless kinds so you don’t have to take it off. Also, don’t be too hard on yourself. Your guy cares about you and has made it clear he still wants you regardless of how you view yourself.