I’ve come to the conclusion that the best way to develop friendships with people is to chat with them and have longer, more meaningful conversations. I’ve gotten better at working up the courage to talk to people (haha progress!) but I‘ve found I struggle to come up with topics or ways that may initiate longer convos. What, if anything, worked for any of you?
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Imho “initiate” is not quite the right way to think about it. A discussion is a living thing; starting out small, feeding it with interesting bits along the way, and then (sometimes) it grows up to be something big.
I’ve had luck with asking open ended questions about whatever I’ve been thinking about lately and being open to learning about other people’s experiences and perspectives. This works even if it seems a bit out of the blue. For instance, I’ve been meditating a bit recently, and I’ve asked a few people at work if they’ve ever tried it. These were mostly people I didn’t know that well, and it led to interesting conversations.
I also like to keep in mind that recent studies have shown that people are generally more open to talking with strangers and more open to having deeper conversations than most other people expect. People actually enjoy having surprise deeper conversations, so you shouldn’t be scared to try it.