The porn is not the issue. I watch porn too. We don’t think it’s a big deal, usually, but lately every time I see his history or Twitter likes, it’s always full of porn with ‘cheating’ captions. I think almost 95% of that, and lately he’s been liking A LOT of stuffs that I’m getting scared and concerned about his well-being
I want to be respectful and not judge but I think I’m concerned. Is this possible trauma? And should I support it? I already tried asking him but I think he always got too uncomfortable. I try not to judge him but it also rubs me the wrong way that he doesn’t want to at least *talk* to me, and it makes me wonder if he thinks I’d be cheating on him?? Is that what he’s thinking? How do I get him to open up?
We’ve been dating for 6 months, any help is appreciated. We’re not Americans.
TL;DR: Boyfriend of six months watch cheating porn a lot. He’s not hiding it but refuse to talk to me about it. How do I approach my confusion about it?
2 comments
Is this affecting your relationship? Is his behavior worrisome in some way? If he simply enjoys watching something sexually taboo, such as the idea of cheating, then that doesn’t seem like a big deal. It is very common for people to sexualize fears. It’s an issue if the porn watching is actually causing negative effects on his life. If it is affecting how he behaves with you or your sex life together.
Him not wanting to talk about it isn’t great. I do think by the six month mark you should be willing to discuss your kinks with the other person. But I can see why he’d be nervous doing so given that you don’t seem very comfortable with it. Have you had a discussion together about your kinks and sexual fantasies? But it’s entirely possible he only likes to think about cheating in the context of masturbation and may have no interest in it outside of that.
Maybe with you both enabling each other to watch this Stuff—–he is secretly LUSTING after girls on there that you can’t compete with.(FAKES) Set boundaries. No bonding I am seeing Here, dear.