So I have been very close friends with a girl for the past year or so. We have long deep conversations, share personal secrets, and go to each other in times of need. Recently our relationship grew a little distant, however. Today I had an argument with a mutual friend, and she dm that friend to try to patch us up. I learned that during that conversation, she said that ” I feel apologetic but angry at him(referring to me) like, all the time, it’s like a fact of being friends with him.” and “I’ve been friends with him for some time now and it can be rly frustrating but I feel he’s trying to be nice too”
I’ve always thought that she truly enjoyed being with me, and that seems to be the case judging from our experiences together. It does not make sense that she would start so many conversations with me and tell me so much about herself if being with me made her frustrated and angry. It’s also strange that she feels that I am only trying to be nice, considering I treated her with all my sincerity and care. She did explain that she said these partly to comfort that friend, but I am not sure how much I believe her. I am confused, hurt and too afraid to ask her.
6 comments
As difficult as it seems. The best thing you can do is talk to her. Yes it will make feel you uncomfortable, but after it, everything will be gone and you will have a clear and peaceful mind.
You can do it 🙂
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She very well could be seeing someone and that is why she has grown distant. Or, are you being completely honest with your intentions and were just trying to sideways your way into a relationship? To be honest, it also sounds to me like you may have shared to much about your personal life but, that is just a guess.
The moment you are too afraid to talk with someone you are that close to is the giant sign over your head indicating that you should do it anyways. I’ve been in the exact same position as your friend and it sucked from this side of things too, knowing you hurt the person you’re so close with while just trying to help.
This is going to be a growing moment for both of you and your friendship will come out stronger for it, as long as you are willing to genuinely listen and understand each other. Sending hugs
>It does not make sense that she would start so many conversations with me and tell me so much about herself if being with me made her frustrated and angry.
People are complex and emotions are illogical. It may not make any sense, but she could genuinely value your time together and also feel frustrated and angry at the same time. Before you assume she doesn’t, you need to talk to her.
It’s possible to be friends with someone, even if they are sometimes frustrating or make us angry. It’s quite unhealthy to expect everything to be perfect all of the time.