I have no vices like alcohol consumption, tobacco, pot or any other similar stuff.
My family and upbringing are not conservative but vices like these are still looked down upon. I also personally don’t see the appeal of consuming alcohol to feel good.
Having said that, I am also tired of being lonely. I have never been in a relationship. All three of my heartbreaks have been of the same kind- smart, mature, trustworthy, friendly guy but I like your friend better, can we be friends instead? What bugs me is all three of them didn’t find me worthy of going on a first date.
The three friends which got into relationships with these three girls were all sort of like me except they look better and / or have had the opportunity to have lots of interesting stories- overseas travels, fancy restaurants, etc. We couldn’t afford it so all I know a lot about is board games, movies and other indoorsy stuff.
It doesn’t help that I am good at my job, was good at school, college- you name it. When girls come to know about it somehow, I can feel them getting bored. It’s a vicious cycle- I am awkward around new girls or girls I have an interest in because I don’t have experience. I don’t have experience because I am awkward.
I am 24M and have an older friend, 32M who has been insanely successful with girls in his 20s- casual, long term, one night stands, even overseas. He suggested that I can’t be both unattractive and uptight and since I can only change one, I should consider drinking. Girls like “fun” and “chilled out” guys. Before you lash out at him, he didn’t explicitly say this- this is me connecting the dots. All he said was girls like fun guys and being a bit tipsy will work in my favour.
I am not a fan of the idea but it does make sense. I am not looking for completely casual relationships where I know it’s not gonna work out but I am willing to give chance to any and all relationships wher there’s a more than 50-50 chance of it becoming serious.
1 comment
Been in your shoes. Drinking makes me much more outgoing and witty and ended up with more girls. But having to drink to have fun leads down a dark and depressing path. Focus on you and your work. The right type of girl will show up and it’ll be a lot better than one you meet at a bar and only have being drunk in common.