TL;DR my 37 bf, (i’m 34) is gone in another country with one of his ex for work, and obviously doesn’t have a lot of time for me.

So i’m getting triggered. He is asking me to trust him but the way he presented the sleeping situation it kinda indicates they are also sharing a room.

He is telling me to trust him, he didn’t do anything wrong, and asking me to not make thint worse, because i did get mad at him and told him I’m triggered by this situation.

It is hard for me to not get triggered in this situation since the only reassuring he is offering me are just… Words.

I have to deal with this situation for another week and I don’t know what to do. I am angry because he is asking me to not make things worse, since I didn’t generate this situation.

But there should be some consequences and I need advice how to set some boundaries or actions, to set some things clear. What would you do until he comes back to have a real face to face talk?

12 comments

  2. ummm if they are traveling for work why are they sharing a room ?? I don’t think ANY company would ask employees of the opposite sex to share a room. That is VERY suspect. That just wouldn’t happen.

  3. > it kinda indicates that they’re sharing a room

    So are they actually sharing a room? Or are you assuming?

  4. Turn the tables, tell him you’ve thought about it and you’re fine with having an open relationship.
    Stop being the needy one, if he’s sharing a room with an ex he is scum. Why are you crying over him, treat him as he deserves.
    As much as you are hurting, people like him don’t care,
    Show him indifference and he’ll sprout wings (temporarily).
    Then you tell him you’re not interested.
    Don’t waste energy on him, use it to shine your spine.

  5. There’s no way they have to share the room if they’re travelling for work, they want to share the room. Is this the first time he’s given you a reason not to trust him? Has he lied/hid things from you before?

  6. Why sharing a room? This in itself is very strange, employers normally always get separate rooms for their employees. You need a answer for this question first and why he did not pay for his own room if knowing this would or is a trigger for you.

  7. A company normally never does this, simply to avoid any of the situations. Even if they werent exes, most people that are in a relationship would be uncomfortable with this. To be honest, most companies i know or worked with have a policy AGAINST this when it comes to work travel.

  8. No way are they required to share a room with the opposite sex, most companies frown upon it. I wouldn’t be accepting that, I’d be immediately done.

  12. This isn’t okay, and if it was really a work trip, they wouldn’t be made to share rooms.

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