How did you figure out what you wanted in life and at what age?

11 comments

1. I still haven’t figured that out and I’m 38

2. I always knew I wanted children, for as long as I can remember. I didn’t know I wanted love and marriage until I met my husband. I thought I wanted a career and chased that from 18-27 and then I realized that it wasn’t where my joy lived.

   I think you have to really understand and realize that we are only given a certain amount of minutes in this life and one day it will be over. How do you want to spend those minutes? Family is my joy, my peace and it is my life goal to grow a family. Where is your joy and your peace-those will usually lead you in the right direction.

3. I don’t have it figured out yet and I’m in my 30s. I take it day by day, if there is something I want then I research, plan, take action. If I decide somewhere along that line I’m no longer wanting it then that’s cool, I’ll start something else that will make me happy.

   I can’t expect that at any one point in my life I’ll know what will bring me joy and fulfillment for the rest of it. The world changes, we all change and grow. Think short term and long term, but don’t get too set on any one thing.

4. When I was just starting my master’s degree I had a coworker leave our department. When I asked him where he was going he told me his new title. I’d never heard of it, so I researched it. I’m the type of person who crowdsources opinions from my trusted people, so it surprised me when I contacted my advisor right after researching and switched to that master’s degree instead without asking anyone in my life about it. It just ticked all my boxes. I got my master’s in 2009 and am still in the field (Instructional Design).

   All the other things in my life just kind of happened, and I’m happier for them. I bought my first property at 21 cause I honestly didn’t realize I shouldn’t be able to. I bought a condo. I lost it to a short sale during the housing collapse, but moved somewhere that gained me over $100k in equity when I sold that place. I’m now in my 3rd home and have a lot more equity than $100k.

   I was on my lunch break and a dog jumped into my car. I had just permanently closed a dog door in my condo cause I didn’t want a dog. I grew up with a bunch of dogs and was enjoying time without them. Well, that dog and I were together until he passed at 16.5. He changed my life. I’d grown up with golden retrievers, so it was quite shocking to get a pitbull, but now they are my favorite breed and I’ll get another one when I’m ready for another dog.

   I got a hysterectomy when I was 37 due to health issues. I’d spent most of my 30’s fence sitting about kids, so that made that decision for me. I know I can adopt if I really want to, but I believe “if it isn’t an eff yes, it should be a no” about kids, and I’ve never thought of it as an “eff yes”, so I’ll take the no on that one.

   I made some really dumb decisions monetarily and have gotten myself out of $65k worth of debt.

   Now, at almost 40, the things I “want in life” are different. I have the house, the job, the degree(s), etc. Now I just want peace and status quo. I want health. I want the ability to travel (even though it isn’t my favorite hobby). I want the ease to get myself out of any dumb situations I put myself in. And I want to help the people I’ve decided are worth helping…whether with my money or my time.

5. I’m still soul searching.

6. Around age 48 I realized all I wanted was to retire.

7. When my son moved out and I was 40. I had time and space to think about what I wanted and how to get there. 5 years later and I’m still enjoying my life and discovering new pathways or ambitions all the time.

8. When I was a junior in high school, I worked as a volunteer at a child daycare facility. I had always loved children before that and thought perhaps I wanted to be a pediatrician, but organizing small lessons and games made it clear to me that what I really wanted to do was teach. After that, I worked as a teacher’s aide in a summer school program before my senior, and that just made it all the more clearer to me that was where I belonged.

9. I’m nearly 40 and I have no f-ing clue. I know I want to be happy, but no clue how.

10. When I turned 20 I asked myself so hard hitting questions. I asked myself what do I truly want in my life? What will really bring me peace and happiness? What kind of women do I want to be. Once I got an answer to those I was happy as it lead me to have a goals to work towards. So I would say 20 is when I figured out what I was looking for.

11. I settled into my career, by pure chance, about four years ago. As for everything else…still very much figuring it out at forty.