I (M24) had been exclusively dating this girl (F22) for 6 months. Really had fun with her, did a lot of fun things together. We saw each other around once a week, because she lives in another city around 40 mins away and we’re both busy. She introduced me to her parents and brother.
Then one date, during pillowtalk, she invited me to her birthday party to meet her girlfriends. I asked her if I should introduce myself as her boyfriend, or how she sees me. She said she likes the way it is now and that she finds real relationships scary and that she’s never had one before. She asked me if I wanted to have a relationship, and I just said that I like her company and I’m open for it, but not necessarily, and mainly just wanna see where it goes. Not putting pressure on her. Then when I invited her for a date a few days later, she said she would ”let me know” because of her busy work schedule, I replied ”Ok!” and she never got back to me. This is a little over 4 weeks ago now. After that last date, she also stopped snapchatting me everyday. I also cut all contact with her right after this last text exchange. She didn’t block me or anything though, and we still have each other on all social media platforms.
I’m just posting this to hear your opinions, because this is weird right? She probably felt a bit smothered or maybe pressured, that’s why she left. But ghosting is pretty immature. She spent so much time on me, and also much money. She was always openly affectionate on public dates. She even made a painting for me (she’s very creative). Why would you do that for someone for 6 months straight and then just leave all of a sudden? I don’t need advice, because I’m definitely never hitting her up again until she hits me up. Just wanna hear your opinions, and if anyone experienced something similar.
8 comments
A person that wants to spend time with you, will make time for you.
The ball is in her court as she notified you that she’ll let you know when she’s available. However, if she hasn’t gotten back in a month… I’m sorry OP. You are better off moving on and spending your mental energy on someone who deserves it.
God dating today is all social media isn’t it? The entire dynamic has changed. Completely. Irreversibly. I shake my head at this world.
Yes ghosting all of a sudden without talking and explaining look very childish to me too, but maybe she is a person from Reddit as it is the commonly way people seems to solve relationship issue here.
I went through something very similar man, a couple different details but the same kind of situation as far as meeting up consistently, doing fun things and talk of meeting friends. I don’t really have anything new to add, just that I feel for you, it really sucks and messed me up for a bit.
I’m kind of holding out for an explanation at some point but like you I don’t think I’ll reach out. As someone else said, if they wanted to reach out they will, but I just don’t get why they can’t say something, like even just a simple “I had fun but I’m not feeling it anymore” is better than being left wondering if it was something I did or something completely unrelated.
This person obviously is not a respectable person if something serious didn’t happen to her and she straight ghosted you. Like anyone should at least say, ” hey I’m good for now” if anything. It just baffles me how some people are. If you out time and effort into eachother like just be honest. Anywho, you could reach out and explain how you feel about it cause if you didn’t care a little, you wouldn’t be on here explaining this I think. Or, you are justified my friend!
What if her iMessage didn’t go thru? Sometimes it happens, tho it’s rare
I know how you feel. I dated someone exclusively for 5 mths. Initially he said he wanted to take things slow, and I pushed for an answer around the 4.5 mths mark. Didn’t get a straight answer, and he started flaking after that. While I understood it was for the best, it really hurt as we did so much tgt over the few mths. He created so many lovely memories, gave me some very sweet (and pricey) surprises, I met his parents and friends, and he would have met my friends soon if things didn’t end. Being ghosted by him really devastated me.
A year after that, he appeared again and asked me out. I was like, no thanks.
She’s dating someone during your relationship