As a disclaimer: I am in no way shaming any kinks or trying to put these actions into a category; it’s just stuff that I have not seen other men I’ve been with do.
I guess I am just wondering if these are normal or more common.
So my boyfriend is more submissive, which I don’t really mind. He steps up to a more dominant role when I don’t feel like it. However, one thing he does is pretend to ride me. He will sit on top of my pelvis area and move his hips. It doesn’t feel like anything to me and it’s not like he is touching his dick or balls.
Another thing unusual is he likes when I slap his ass or grab his ass. It turns him on a lot.
He also likes choking. But he likes when I choke him. He doesn’t like choking me or slapping me. He would rather me slap and choke him.
There are other things that aren’t really a big deal to me because other guys in my past encounters have asked the same of like: sucking their nipples, playing with their nipples, and spitting on them.
7 comments
He seems like he is into being a sub. and wants you to be dom
Their are far more feminine things he could be doing. I personally like my spouse grabbing my ass when fucking. Also, as far as riding, have you told him this. Maybe he doesn’t realize it. My wife grabs my hips and moves me into the right position, even moving my hips the right way if she doesn’t like the position.
Equating submissive tendencies to feminity is incorrect.
If he was into sissy play then you cpuld equate that with feminity.
The riding part to me suggest that he might be imagineing about being pegged.
Tldr everything you ahve stated is very normal when a person is a submissive read up on bdsm to widen your knowledge
I think that the ass grabbing and slapping is pretty common. Especially the grabbing. I find men really like that. Men who are dominant as well.
The other things I have no experience with.
Some people like the fewling of air flow being restricted as they climax. It’s something that elevates the experience and sensations for people who are comfortable with being choked.
The cowboy thing I’ve not heard of but try to get into it. Try smacking his ass or squeezing his dick between your legs. Maybe ask what he wants you to be doing, say that you want to get into it but you’re not sure what you should be doing while he’s riding you like that.
I think the breathplay, if done correctly, would stimulate a man the same way it would a woman. It’s maybe not common with man but i wouldn’t call that feminine.
None of those things you mentioned are feminine. Maybe not what you are used to, but they are not feminine by your description. Let’s go more extreme, like pegging. The receiver isn’t being feminine, he just like anal and prostate stimulation.
I like a lot of those things too. But I think the difference is that my partner and I do communicate about them and she gets into it too. She’ll sometimes hump my butt or other body parts rather than your bf who seems to just ride you with no explanation and claiming he doesn’t like pegging. We do various things that we call role reversal or ‘gender fuckery’ It’s a ton of fun.
It sounds like the issue here is that you can’t really figure out what he wants and that he hasn’t really asked for your consent to indulge in these kinks. I think you need to have a talk with him and if he tries to just blow it off, let him know that those things are off the table until you feel it’s been adequately communicated on, with terms of what is and isn’t allowed.