I (F25) was sleeping with a friend of a friend (M25) and we were getting on super well. Only happened a few times with like 3 weeks or a month in between.
The last time we got together he said he hadn’t been able to stop thinking about me and talked about wanting to give it a go and to think about it – I’ve just moved about 2 hours away so we aren’t living as close together now. I had said I had wanted to get to know him more too.
Anyway the conversation from both sides was pretty much, we’re both really into each other maybe we should give it a try. We had been sneaking around cause of our mutual friends but he was like we don’t need to do that anymore really.
The next morning he said, have a think about what we were talking about last night. I was like oh that’s nice you brought it up again and it wasn’t just cause we’d been drinking the night before.
Anyway he text me and then I suggested we meet up to talk about it but we were both too busy so benched it for a week or two. I messaged him last night about trying to meet up soon, just something chill and have a chat.
He then said to me he thinks we should leave it. I decided to ask him why and gave him a few options like was it the distance or did he think we would work, just cause I knew I’d want some closure (I don’t usually do that sort of thing but felt like I could with him). He replied saying he’s not really looking to date anyone right now.
I’m not entirely torn up about it because I respect his choice and I’m not one to push him further on it but I’m just confused how he can go from telling me he’s so into me and like encouraging relationship type things to then saying he doesn’t want to date anyone????
For context I don’t think he’s really had a girlfriend before and can be a bit of an awkward person that I feel like maybe he hadn’t thought about what was really involved in being in a relationship and realised he wanted his single life for a bit longer – such mixed messages and so confusing.
Honestly just any insight or experience of this sort of thing would be perfect!
TLDR: he says he can’t stop thinking about me and wants to give it a go then 2 weeks later says he’s not looking to date anyone right now. What is going on???
1 comment
A person that wants to spend time with you, will make time for you.
Someone that flakes out on plans has commitment issues and is most indecisive. That or he found someone else closer since he can’t deal with a LDR. Point is you are better off focusing your mental energy on someone who will appreciate you and want to engage with you.
Sorry OP, and best of luck.