Greetings fellow subjects. I am a representative of the Hudson Bay Company stationed on San Juan Island, rightfully part of our great colony, but disputed with the damned upstarts who claim it as part of their Washington Territory.
My pig broke loose recently and got into my neighbor’s (an American squatter) potato patch, upon which the fine beast was executed in cold blood. Pray tell, what should my next actions be? I would hate to start some sort of Pig War, but the American fool needs to be punished for his crimes.
26 comments
I might get burned at the stake for this, but you’re the Tory, keep your swine out of other people’s crops, the yankee was only protecting it’s potatoes.
Lol I remember this bit of history.
Call the royal navy, you idiot. What do you think Britannia rules the waves for.
Goddamnit, not again
You brits confuse me. Which San Juan island are we talking about?
Defund the pig, clearly.
You bought one of those cheap Wilkes maps didn’t you?
Your pig was eatin’ our taters!
So we cooked him up and ate ‘im. With taters.
We can wait you out. San Juan Islands shall be ours!
This is great. George Washington’s father fought in the Battle of Jenkin’s Ear. We just need to find a pithy slogan and get the neighbors with torches and pitchforks.
Is this potato farmer a Yankee who supports that Illinois crook trying to violate my state’s rights? If so, you have every right to seek just compensation from that tyrant-loving filth. While you await the arrival of the Royal Navy, I would advise acquiring more arms so as to properly defend your own land in case he or anyone else tries to unlawfully infringe on your property.
Remember to tell your American acquaintances to vote for Breckenridge! #MakeAmericaGreat
Get back to beavermongering!
Get the Hawaiian servants!
I’d just eat the loss… Americans are pretty good at just taking everything if you argue with them
Called it upon yourself, keep your beast to your own territory.
Go talk to the Germans
Fire up the grill
Your next steps should be to learn how to take precautions with your animals getting loose, and to apologize to all of us who had to read your insults.
HA! You made me giggle with this. Whatever you do, don’t invade the US side without orders.
This sounds familiar… Too familiar.
This is a repost from the 17th century. We’re are the mods?!
Execute order 66
You may eventually resort to having the matter resolved by Kaiser Wilhelm I of all people
The Pig War turned out OK for the us ultimately. We got the islands and the Sound, and Britain got…nothing? Good riddance.
Thank you Oversimplified for helping me understand this joke lol.
What would John Wick do?
Have you tried fucking off to 54°40′?
feral hog posting