Why would you cancel a date?

33 comments

1. Because I’m sick/tired. A (family) emergency. Or if the person I was supposed to go on a date with has said or done something that made me reconsider.

2. Anxiety.

3. I hardly decide to go date but if so I won’t cancel it unless for a very hard reason like an accident.

4. Because I didn’t want to go. Because I got sick. Because something urgent came up. Because the person I’d been going to go with had said or done something weird or offputting. Because I had a really long hard week at work and more Being Social was the last fucking thing I needed just then. Because my good friend had an emergency.

5. I didn’t want to go. Something came up and I couldn’t go.

6. Emergency or red flag from the other person.

7. Feeling unwell or tired, had an emergency come up, don’t feel like going anymore

8. Because I don’t have the emotional energy to go and be social. I am an introvert and hate dating but know it is a necessary evil.

9. If the guy asks for nudes or sends any, if I find out that he has a serious criminal record/habitually criminal lifestyle beyond motoring offences, if he is very family orientated or religious.

10. Sick/injured, emergency situation, if I realize deep down I’m really just not feeling it, anything happening/red flag that now makes my gut say no, don’t go.

11. * I don’t want to go
    * I’m sick
    * I’m tired
    * I’ve decided I don’t want to date this person
    * Something came up and I can’t make it

12. I canceled one date ever, a close (not immediate) family member died unexpectedly and I had to help with arrangements and comfort the immediate family.

    No way would I have been good company that night! He offered to come over and do laundry and get them packed for the flight the next day.

    Married 33 years this autumn.

13. Illness, emergency or finding out something highly incriminating about my date that puts me in danger.

14. When he sends me an accidental unsolicited dick pick before the date.

15. I changed my mind, I’m tired, etc.

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18. Tbh if I know that not only am I not interested, but I won’t give 100%

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20. If my child/children were poorly or needed me. Nothing comes before my kids, nada.

21. Not going outside

22. If you don’t want to go, listen to your gut. It’s usually right

23. Personal emergency or simply because my gut feeling telling me not to go. Usually it’s always correct.

24. He said something that made me realize he’s a dumb ass, and I’m not wasting any more of my time.

25. Because the guy does not seem worth the extra time in a bra and makeup.

26. Probably because I checked him out on google and found something concerning.

27. I have to work overtime, my kid is sick, I’m sick, I’m out of spoons.

28. Because im incredibly capricious and fickle and im known to change my mind at the drop of a hat

29. The obvious answer is illness. The less obvious answer is if in setting up the date, the prospective suitor finds some way to cross boundaries.

    For example, I matched with someone who put on their profile that they lived in the same part of town that I did. Came to find out that they actually lived about an hour and half away. I had tried to set up a date that would be somewhere central to the both of hs, but he absolutely refused to meet me halfway. He wanted me to meet him at night in a park that was even further away from me and didn’t understand why I wasn’t interested in that. He also wanted me to blow off my pre-arranged plans with friends for the evening… or to bring them along to the date.

    He kept texting me things like “you’re not going to make the effort? You’re so sure that this is doomed to fail? Wow, you’re just so cynical.” Uh no dude, it’s bot that I don’t want to make an effort. I don’t want to be the only one making an effort. That’s making me think that I will always be the one who makes the effort. Not a good look.

30. I used to not cancel for any reason other than an emergency, even if I was getting bad vibes or reconsidering my choice to go on that date.

    That changed after I went through a bad breakup and started spending a lot of time on dating apps, because I believed getting myself back out there would cure my heartache. I agreed to go on a date with the first guy who expressed interest in me and could hold a halfway decent conversation, but in the few days before our date, he mentioned he’d been arrested a few times. I felt a little uneasy about that, but I figured I didn’t know his story and should give him a chance. He spent 45 minutes of our date recounting all the bars he’d been thrown out of for fighting, all the dumb things he beat people up over, and his multiple arrests for assault. Most anxious I have ever been on a date.

    Now, if I see red flags before a date, I’ll cancel.

31. Feeling sick is really the only reason I would.

32. Because I’m married

33. If something more important came up or if I discovered something about the guy that made me think again about meeting him.