Husband sleeps/rests easy when I’m out late.
It is currently 10pm. I am over 10 miles away from my husband and haven’t spoken to him nor seen him all day. I noticed the time and wanted to check in but when I called I got no response. He finally answered… was incoherent and nonchalant.
He is always so comfortable at home when I am out. He doesn’t check in or anything of the sort and it makes me feel uncared for…
Am I right to be upset or being immature?
14 comments
Sounds like he trusts you and he’s enjoying his alone time too! Consider yourself lucky we get a lot of posts here about jealous spouses when they go out alone.
Sounds a little immature to me, but I have no context. Do you stay out late often? Does he know where you are? How concerned is he supposed to act?
… are you doing things that *should* concern your husband?
You honestly seem to be looking for something to be upset about. If you want your husband to check in on you when you are out due to those reasons you mentioned–tell him so.
Nah he should check-in. Even if he has the all the trust in you in the world.
If it’s important to you it should be important to him.
I know what you’re saying. If I am walking home late at night, my husband will usually offer to come and meet me and walk me home. I find it sweet.
I wouldn’t necessarily take this as a lack of caring though. Your husband may just not think there is anything to worry about. Especially if you don’t seem nervous or worried when you’re leaving.
I guess it comes down to how caring he is on a general basis!
Your being immature.
You say you’re with your family in a comment.
So why exactly is should he be worried/not sleep easy?
Sounds like he’s just enjoying alone time. When my wife is going out without me I’ll ask when she’s going to be back and if she’s not back by that time without notice then I’ll call and ask if everything’s ok. Otherwise I leave her be
Truthfully, I’d just tell him that when you’re away you miss him and it’d mean the world to you if he’d check in a little throughout the day or reach out to say goodnight when he’s going to bed.
I get where you’re coming from. You want him to miss you and think about you when you’re not around. And you think he doesn’t care about your absence because he doesn’t reach out and he’s comfortable just going to sleep and has no trouble sleeping without you there. But I don’t think that means he doesn’t care about you or miss you when you’re gone. It may just not occur to him to reach out to you, or he may not realise that you would like him to/could think checking it would be annoying because you’re busy depending on why you’re away from home.
Girl, what? You are the reason men feel damned if they do, damned if they don’t.
Good for him. Life is hard, resting is important.
This is silly…..
Nothing will keep my husband from sleeping. Absolutely nothing.
If it’s 9pm especially. Dude will be out.
I understand what you mean because my husband does the same thing. I know it’s because he trusts me but he also has ADHD so I’m out of sight out of mind.
It feels a little lonely when you know you would be checking in on them if it were getting late to make sure they were all good or just to say goodnight and you know they don’t do the same for you.