I M(14) pretty much younger than everyone on this subreddit have no ACTUAL friends at school. Im in 8th grade and I have been at this school for my whole life until the pandemic arrived and I was forced to transfer to a nearer school (which I honestly liked) but then returned back to that previous school for my final year of middle school (I was fine with it, it just seemed unreasonabe since I was just starting to make social connections with my peers in my new school..)Anyways, most of my previous friends from pre-pandemic in that school had also transferred to different schools, making it harder than I thought to make social connections than I initially thought returning back to this school. I thought already knowing my classmates would make it easier to make friends but the problem is, I dont relate to anyone (not trying to say this in the edgy way). Ever since I returned, everything has been awkward and I try to socialize daily with everyone but when they share their likes and dislikes, I have NOTHING in common with them. I dont find the things they find funny, I dont listen to the same music/watch the same films as them (I listen to Lana Del Rey/Frank Ocean and some other indie artists that NO ONE KNOWS and I watch indie films as well). For instance, EVERY male in my school are andrew tate fans or just people I cant really get into with (these dont just apply with males, honestly just everyone in school, I feel I cant connect with). I tried talking to my older friends I knew back then, but it really just felt like interviewing them, I found the things they did ‘corny’ and we shared nothing in common. Its kinda embarassing going out for recess and having nothing to do but just walk around alone, so I try to socialize with those ex-friends during recess but well.. it feels like they have something against me and find me annoying and everytime I try to start a conversation with them, they either ignore me/run away/say they are having a private talk. Can’t really make friends, and ever since, ive always been quiet cause ive tried my best to socialize more often but I feel like the pandemic has ruined my social skills and I haven’t been as outgoing as before.
2 comments
I feel for you guys that were in school during Covid. And at your age specifically, those are very important, formative years. So you had it as bad as anyone. I feel for you bud, I really do.
I’m not sure what advice I can give other than to keep your head and wait until you get to high school, hopefully things will be better.
Curious how big your class/school is.
As someone who couldn’t relate to their classmates – don’t panic. You could try to look for connections outside of school, like hobby groups where people go based on interest and not age group. I never understood the need to relate to people of similar age, if i relate – nice and i don’t care about your age (you could be a grandpa, we could still talk about the thing we have in common). Maybe there is a sort of film viewing club (like a book club) where people gather to watch indie movies?
As for what you could do during recess – do the homework that you got that day. I did that in my school time. You get something to do during recess and you will have more free time after school (as the homework is already done).