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Three herniated discs in lower back from throwing a ball of string over a tree.
I was installing a car stereo in my driveway and the wind blew a bag with some screws in it i needed. When i chased the bag, the wind stopped and i tried to stop running as i was twisting and bending down. Tore my ACL and medial meniscus on my left knee.
Oh, and the bag was empty, i had already dumped out the screws and forgotten.
I snapped a tendon in my middle finger pressing the space bar.
Ripped the top of my pinky almost clear off the bone pulling a pull starter on a lawn mower
I’m 46. Last year I pulled my back yawning.
Last week, I pulled a muscle in my neck either when I was in the gym or by getting up off the couch too fast. Probably the latter, but I told everyone the firmer.
I tore a labrum in my shoulder playing foosball……yes foosball. Had surgery and everything.
Dislocated shoulder putting a jacket on
Pulled a muscle in my neck sleeping.
I once tripped getting out of a cab and fell so hard that my house key jammed itself *into* my thigh. Like, literally into it. Like I was trying to unlock myself.
Threw out my lower back petting a dog. My buddy slipped a cervical disc spitting out tooth paste.
I threw out my back reaching for a pen on a desk.
I went to sleep feeling great, woke up with a my shoulder screaming in pain. It was a partially torn biceps tendon where it attached to the shoulder.
So sleeping. I hurt myself sleeping.
Torn meniscus on a see saw
Black fingernail after lifting manhole cover and having it catch the tip of my finger when it slipped.
So I slipped going down a very slightly inclined ramp from my shed and ended up with 5 hour surgery to reconstruct my elbow. I now have a metal plate and several screws in my elbow. Best part is, I told my boss and she told the whole company I had a gardening accident so when I got back to work o couldn’t even make up a good story, lol
Pulled my groin by jumping over the curb.
Stepped off a curb and threw my back out. Sneezed and threw my back out. Farted and threw my back out.
I am doing proper exercises now to prevent this.
Broke a rib while shaking a cocktail shaker.
This was on my 30th birthday, and we were already joking about the youth days being over. This didn’t help.
Rolled over in bed, reaching for my glasses on my nightstand.
Popped a disc in my back and couldn’t stand up straight for a year. Had to walk with a cane.
It finally fused a decade later, and I’m pain free.
This might not totally fit the bill, but I went to the ER last night because I ate too fast and ended up vomiting. There was a bunch of blood in it. I felt relatively okay so I almost didn’t go, but I thought “This could be a case of ‘man ignores symptoms and ends up dying from internal bleeding’ and I don’t wanna be another statistic” so I decided to get checked out. Flash forward 4 hours and I’m discharged with an RX for antacids. Lol.
Theory is that I puked so hard that I burst a blood vessel in the sphincter between my stomach and esophagus. So in a nutshell I ate too fast and and injured myself.
Threw my hip out yesterday taking off my pants while sneezing
At the ripe old age of 35 I threw my back out for a week….taking a fucking bong hit…
I broke my wrist while flipping a pancake.
I don’t know if i should laugh at this thread or forever live the rest of my life in fear of reaching for something, yawning, sneezing or sleeping…
Reading this shit has me scared to live