My boyfriend and I have known each other since middle school, but lost touch for a few years and have recently began dating. He is a virgin and has fewer sexual experiences than me.
For me, after I do any type of sexual activity I need space. I need to be away from my partner and not be touched. He on the other hand, I noticed needs a lot of physical contact. One of the first times I gave him a blow job when I was done and had washed my hands I sat on the other side of the couch on my phone and he asked me to lay with him (we were watching a movie). I said to give me a minute and he seemed very hurt by this. I was kind of confused because to me the encounter was not that emotionally taxing to need to be held so urgently. Recently, I have noticed he every time we do something and I separate myself afterward it bothers him. I try to go back to holding him later, but I really do need space as my aftercare and cannot handle contact right away.
How do I go about this so I don’t leave him with screwed up sexual experiences? I want him to be comfortable especially when he is ready for sex and other new things.
1 comment
Probably discuss it with him, I hope you can find a compromise somehow. I personally also need the closeness.
EDIT: Also it might be good to try to think about why you need space.