As an European I’ve seen my fair share of US produced media and one thing I have allways found odd is that colleagues are more close than I have ever seen in Europe. Like best friends.
I mean you socialize with coworkers and surely befriend some of them but in my oppinion it is something that does not happen too often.
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Sometimes. I tried to keep work and private life separate though.
They can be, for sure. Almost every place I’ve worked I’ve ended up spending social time with co-workers doing non-work related things. Some of my closest friends are former co-workers. Met my wife at work too.
Sometimes. You spend a lot of your life around these people. If they’re someone you get along with, it makes sense to become friends. I’ve seen statistics that around 1/3 people meet their romantic partner at work or school, for much the same reason.
Media often exaggerates for the sake of telling a story, though.
certainly more common in the US than in Europe, but it’s also not universal.
In the States, we probably see coworkers more than family members. So, some good friendships can develop at work. Adversity brings comradery.
Nope never happens with me
Depends. There are some jobs that you really work together a lot.
You know how college roommates often end up being best friends? Kind of the same thing.
I worked in a place that the group that started the same day and trained together (like 12 people) ended up hanging out, well, until now.
I dated 2 of the guys, a like 4 couples ended up getting married. People lived together (like roommates). We all partied all the time together.
I’ve kinda moved on but I still connect with them on facebook. It’s like 27 years later and they are still going on girls trips.
Speaking of, this Friday my best friend, who I met at work 40 years ago, are doing a Maine roadtrip to get good food.
More of a plot device for workplace shows/movies but there is some truth to it. It’s not rare but it’s not the norm—people are generally friendly with their coworkers, but usually have their own circle of friends outside of work. We work longer hours/take less vacation & holidays, so we do live more of our lives in the workplace. White collar workers also tend to move more frequently for work than Europeans do, so your social connections outside the workplace are often weaker.
Of course, Americans’ casual social interactions might also just mistranslate to some European audiences. Lots of things that Americans do with casual work acquaintances (smiling, hugging, small talk, getting occasional drinks, asking about family, etc.) would convey a higher level of connection in other cultures. We’re sometimes accused of being “fake” by those who don’t understand our social norms.
Generally no, IME
It really varies as a function of industry, age, location, and specific company. In general the younger the employees, the closer they are, because older employees are more interested in earning their paycheck and getting home to their already-established family, whereas younger employees are still meeting people and creating family.
I’ve worked at companies where coworkers ended up getting married, and other companies where coworkers barely had anything to say to each other past 5:00.
I think it depends heavily on the work culture. I’ve worked at places with awful work culture, and at places with really supportive, inclusive work culture.
Shitty work culture where no one likes their job? People tend to live in fear and distrust each other. They tend to maintain superficial relationships.
Really good work culture? People tend to be more comfortable expressing themselves, which leads to more genuine and close relationships, even outside of work.
In my current job, which has a pretty healthy and supportive culture, I am still personal friends with some of my former colleagues who have now moved on to other opportunities.
It’s very common to become close friends with coworkers. People spend a lot of their time at work, and often they’ve moved far away from their families and other friends and are looking for a new social scene. For a lot of us, work is an obvious place to meet a lot of people.
It definitely is not universal, though. It’s a film and TV convenience to have the same people conjoined for both the work and personal life parts of the plots. Even when you do make some friends at work, it usually isn’t the case that *everyone* at your job is spending time together outside of work and involved in each other’s personal business. Just those you’ve particularly connected with.
some of my best friends are from work
Not in my experience. I don’t socialize with my co-workers.
I worked an office job at one of the largest banks in the country, my manager for half that time is now one of my best friends and the 6 of us who were on that team knew everything about each other. We regularly hung out outside of work as friends and would even go clubbing together sometimes. Everyone at that job all bonded over how much we hated it, sometimes it felt like I was back in college and we were all just classmates without a teacher in the room
My most recent office job was the exact opposite, to the point where the only conversations we had were about work and even then they were very short and to the point
I guess Im saying is that it can vary a lot, and while what’s portrayed in the media isnt common it’s absolutely a reality in some spaces
Sometimes it happens absolutely! One of my greatest friends is a co-worker. His kids call me uncle, I’m at the majority of their functions, and we hang out very often outside of work.
When you spend 8+ hours a day 5 days a week with the same people, it’s almost impossible to not get to know them. Some people like to keep work and life separate but I have never been able to do that. Almost every job I have ever worked I have snagged at least one lifetime friend.
>As an European
*The Office* takes place in Europe and shows several people forming friendships and relationships within the show. And while understanding that TV isn’t real life, it shows the concept isn’t foreign to Europe.
It depends! One of my best friends used to be my coworker at a previous job, and we’ve stayed close since then. One of the contributing factors to our friendship was having to work so closely, severely underpaid, for weird hours in a job that was much higher-stress than it should have been. Going through something like that can really form a bond!
It turns out we had other common interests than surviving work, which helped propel us into a continued friendship.
I wouldn’t call any of my current coworkers friends, but we get along well enough in the office.
Yes. I’ll answer from a personal & professional perspective.
Personally, I met my husband at work and three of my closest friends at work. I have other former coworkers I still see socially on a regular basis.
Professionally speaking, I’m a director level hr person. And y’all have no clue as to the amount of coworker drama that happens. Not coworkers being crappy to each other, although that happens too. I’m talking about friends, hookups, relationships, etc and the amount of drama that makes its way into the workplace.
My fav was Amber complaining to hr that Joe was hooking up with her best friend Brittany who sits in the next row of cubes. Oh and Joe is married to wife #3 who used to work for us as a temp. I wish I were making that one up.
Yes. Most of my closest friends are current or former coworkers.
Can be, my closest friend is a coworker. Other coworkers I barely know. Others I would consider “work friends” we can go get a beer and chat, but we don’t hang out or chat regularly. It depends on how you click with those you work with a lot. Also this becomes more a thing as you approach 30 because your social circle can naturally shrink.
My best/life king friends are either from high school or some of my first jobs. At this point in my life though, I don’t have time for new relationships, so I I’m just a coworker who is friendly but turns down happy hour or the batting cages.
It can be but it’s more common in shows that feature the workplace heavily. Way easier than writing more characters and sets for other relationships.
It certainly happens. I can’t speak to big corporations, since I’ve never worked for one myself (doesn’t appeal to me).
But at a smaller company? Heck yeah. I was close personal friends with about half of my team. All in different ways of course, because every person is different.
But as one example to illustrate my point: one time I mentioned, somewhat randomly, to an employee that I was into wilderness hiking on weekends. He surprised me a bit when he said “Can you bring me along on your next hike?” I liked the guy as a solid and reliable employee, so I said “yes.”
I had to quickly modify the hike I had planned, since it was pretty challenging and he probably would have “noped” out and left. So I planned a new route more appropriate to beginners. Enough to be challenging, but not enough that he would walk away.
If you want to get a close personal bond with someone? Help each other out while you’re exploring the wilderness together. There’s nothing quite like being the only two people within 100 miles to have a chance to really get to know each other. He’s still one of my best friends.
When he told me wanted to resign because he wanted to design shoes? I was sad to see him go, but I was like “Uuuuhhhh sure, follow your dreams my dude. I’ll be one of your first customers.” And I was. Turns out the dude absolutely rocks at making shoes. Who would have guessed?
(Incidentally, PM me if you want to get some crazy awesome handmade shoes for yourself! I’ll make an introduction.)
I’m not friends with my coworkers. They’re mostly Filipino immigrants about 10 – 30 years older than me.
I’m friends with one of my friends old coworkers. They’re millennials (like me) and they work in tech; geeky, sarcastic, grew up on the internet.
Yeah. Depends on the culture.
I’m having dinner soon with a former boss who is now a close friend. I’m very close with my peers at work. We chat in a WhatsApp chat all the time. I’ve got other friends from work where we will add a day to trips just to catch up.
I learned a while ago that I don’t want to work with people I don’t like.
I met my husband at work (different departments) and we’ve been together for over 35 years.
I’ve got a few very close friends who are coworkers or former coworkers. Just went on a vacation with one of them. Some workplaces encourage friendships more than others. Most workplace friends are just people I get lunch with, go for a walk with, and maybe go for a drink with after work once in a blue moon.
I’d say Hollywood exaggerates how common deep friendships in the workplace are for plot points, but they aren’t unusual in real life.
I watched the IT crowd, they did everything together.
Are you telling me everyone everywhere in Europe isn’t just like that?!?!
Some are and some aren’t.
This is the case even in TV shows.
Many of my coworkers and former coworkers are fricken awesome. I work remote but when I’m in town I stay at their places. We’d get drunk boating and shit occasionally and go out together. It depends on the place though. I’ve been at other companies that are totally the opposite. Mine feel generally more like a family where I am now
They often are in my experience, yes.
I mean not best friends but I try to have a base level bond. Makes the day better. Except the Europeans. They are cold as ice
They can be. I’ve worked some places where wr really were super close and others where it was more disconnected.
Not really. I only had coworker once in my house. Not interested intermingling my private life with workplace. Many workplaces are toxic and this causes a lot of people to be extremely frustrated when they are trapped in such environment and can’t leave. I only have one colleague as a friend and we knew each other professionally and socially before we ended at the same office and we remained friends after we departed to different jobs. Movies idealizes non-existing relations. Everyone is pretty much happy to make living and live their life. Does deep friendship or romance happen? Sure it does, but it is far less common than depicting in movies.
TV shows (I don’t think just American ones, look at the original British version of *The Office*) like making their world self-contained. Workplace-based shows have a tendency to overstate the frequency of workplace friendships and relationships because then the social lives of the characters will be easier to explain and understand.
Personally, as a teacher my job does not really force close relationships with other teachers. We are in our separate classrooms most of the time. I have a couple of personal friends that I have met through work but it took a long time to become real, socialize-outside-of-work friends.
Sometimes. I’ve had jobs that were consuming like that. Dating coworkers, lots of drama, etc.