Title says it all pretty much. I’m (26F) someone who has had over 20 sexual partners, some were long term relationships, others long term friends w benefits, and a few one night stands but not many. The best sex I ever had was always with friends with benefits, never my long term partners. And it’s starting to become concerning for me.
I absolutely adore my partner. He’s my best friend, the most supportive, the most loving, the most caring. But I feel our sex is missing something that I can’t put my finger on. All I know is when I have sex with a friend with benefits it felt so much more “real” and passionate and intense. Like I could get lost in it so easily. But with a partner, I feel more in my head, more worried about his pleasure, making sure I feel pleased, etc. like I’m more in my head and it’s ruining the experience for me. It’s not like we don’t know what gets each other off, we do, we have great sexual communication and chemistry, but I feel I’m ruining it on my end because I can’t get out of my head.
Has anyone else had this problem or has ideas on how to go about it?
2 comments
Yes. No idea how to go about it, I think it’s normal.
But I have found that never writing off causal partners for potential relationships helps.
Long term relationships are not for everyone. It’ll be awfully hard to erase that idea from your brain. Just keep doing what worked for you