Hey I’m 19 yo male, I was wondering how I can change from people pleaser to dominant. The reason I want this, is because I have a lot of confidence but I don’t have a lot of self respect,I’m currently changing from loser mindset to growth mindset and I don’t feel that comfortable in my own skin. Maybe I’m understanding things wrong, in that regard feel free to correct me.
2 comments
If you notice that people often ask you to repeat what you’re saying or perhaps you get ignored a lot speak a lot louder. Whenever you’re talking always manually go to louder tone, this will undoubtedly make you seem more confident but make sure you add some extra confidence into the mix by adjusting your speaking style, maintaining eye contact, actively engaging in the argument etc…
Don’t try to be dominant. Aim for being assertive. You don’t need to dominate other people, you just need to stand up for yourself.
Have your own boundaries and voice them when needed. Treat other people with respect, but treat yourself with respect too. So if someone asks where to go for dinner – share your opinion instead of saying “whatever, it doesn’t matter.” If someone (other than your boss) asks you to do something that’s really inconvenient or uncomfortable for you – say “no”. Learn to accept that sometimes people will be annoyed or disappointed that you won’t do what they want. But if it’s something you feel strongly about it, just let them have their feelings and stick to your own boundaries.
You don’t have to dominate anyone in order to stand up for yourself and to be respected.